Page 46 of Convincing the Catcher

Backing up slightly, he kneels down again but keeps a palm on my cheek. “You just lost your dad, Harley. You aren’t thinking straight.”

“And I don’t want to either,” I growl, frustrated. “Because every time I do, I remember he’s dead.” Big, fat tears spill from my eyes. “Please, Cane. It doesn’t have to mean anything. It won’t mean anything. I just need this. I really need this.”

Though I ache for his touch, pain shoots through my chest. A reminder that my pain is still here, even though I’m doing what I can to mask it.

Reaching forward, I slide my hand under the fabric of his shirt. My palm skates upward against his rigid abdomen.

“Don’t make me beg you, Cane,” I rasp. “Please.”

CANE

Hard is staring into your dream girl’s eyes while she begs for you to take the pain away, but what she’s asking you to do, you know you can’t. Even if you’ve thought about it countless times. Even if you’ve stroked your cock to images of it. And even if your dick pulsates when you’re just looking at her.

I am not going to fuck Harland Meadows right now. I can’t.

Even if she hadn’t dropped the bomb that she was a virgin, I would have told her no because she made me promise that this wouldn’t turn romantic because that wasn’t what she wanted. But add in the virginity part and the fact that her father died yesterday? She isn’t in her right mind right now. And if I did anything sexual with her, I’d feel like I was taking advantage.

Not to mention she’d regret it. I know she would.

“Harley,” I whisper, my own vision blurring with tears because I know how much pain she must be in, “I can’t do that with you. Not right after your dad died.”

“Why not?” she snaps, keeping her voice low. “You’ve slept with everyone else on campus. Am I not pretty enough for you? Do you only fuck girls who look like supermodels?” she says angerly, trying to stand up.

“Stop,” I say, moving my hands to her wrists and keeping her there. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, Harland. And in any other circumstances⁠—”

“So, all you needed me for was to save your reputation?”

Hate spews with every word that spills from her pretty lips, but I know it’s the grief talking, and I’ll need to keep reminding myself of that each time she speaks because it’ll get worse, I’m sure.

“You have a rich daddy, so buying my meds in return for me to save your stupid social media presence was an easy choice, huh?”

“Catch—”

“Don’t,” she says through gritted teeth. “Don’t call me that.”

“Harland,” I whisper, trying to plead with her. “I promise you, I’m telling you no because I care.”

“Fuck you,” she snarls, and despite the weeks I’ve gotten to know her, I don’t know the person who is sitting in front of me right now. “I need you to leave. Go. Get out of my house.”

“I don’t want to le⁠—”

“NOW!” she roars, the veins in her neck popping out.

I hear the sound of a car door closing, and I know her mom has made it back home. The last thing I want to do is leave Harley, but with the way she’s breathing and the fury on her face while she’s glaring at me right now, I know I don’t have a choice. I need to leave her—at least for a few days.

Leaning forward, I press my lips to her forehead. She fights it, thrashing in my arms, and I’m not surprised by her strength, given how good of a catcher she is.

“I will be back, Harland. I promise.” I kiss her forehead once more. “It’s okay that you hate me right now. Because if hating me makes this easier for you, hate away. But don’t hate me forever, all right?”

She’s silent for a moment, and her chest heaves.

“Leave,” she mutters.

And even though I don’t want to do it, even though I wish I could stay right here …

I leave. Because it’s not about what I want right now. It’s about what she needs.

And in this moment … I may not be it.