Page 49 of Snowed In with the Jilted Duke

She shook her head, even knowing she was scattering tears over him. “I ruin everything. Everything I want, I ruin. It’s never mine.”

“I’m here, Pippa. I’m yours now.”

“No. No.” He needed to understand. She pulled away so she could look at him, scrubbing the tears from her cheeks. “It’s not that. It’s more. Nothing is mine.”

He nodded, his expression thoughtful. “You have been second to your sister for a long time, have you not? Ever since you were told she was to be a duchess. Trying to find a place for yourself that was not tied to your twin.”

Pippa looked away, staring blankly at the snowy landscape as it passed by. After a moment’s hesitation, he reached out to take her hand. She allowed it, but still refused to look at him.

“You haven’t seen what I’ve seen, Pippa. You made yourself a place in my family that Penelope never had. Everyone was impressed by how you organized the garland making and kept the peace. Grandmama loves you as you are. And the servants. I think you’re the only one of the whole family who knows all of them by name.”

She pulled away again and retreated to her corner. “You don’t understand.”

“I want to understand, pigeon. But I can only understand what you explain to me.”

Pippa turned her head to gaze out of the window. He would never understand. Only one person would.

With a sudden desperation, she needed to talk to Penny. To finally have no secrets between them, to talk about her feelings for Oliver and apologize for everything her envy had driven her to do.

She had no idea where her twin could be, and the loss ached almost as much as when she had thought Penny was going to die.

How could she make amends if she did not even know where Penny was?

14

Alight rap on the door of her private drawing room brought the dowager duchess’s attention back from her thoughts.

"Enter," she called.

Teasdale opened the door and bowed deeply, a letter perfectly centered on the silver salver in his hand. "Your grace, a note has arrived for his grace, which you may wish to open in his absence. It arrived shortly after the duke’s, er, departure with Miss Philippa.”

"Bring it here, then." She picked up the letter and raised her eyebrows.

It was Hugo's handwriting. Even with her rheumy eyes, she could distinguish that.

"Open it. Read it to me."

"Yes, your grace." Teasdale set the salver down and broke the wax seal of the note, unfolding it with a deliberation that threatened to drive her to insanity.

He read it over until she demanded, "Well? What does it say?"

Teasdale looked up, a broad smile briefly creasing his dark face before his expression returned to its usual impassivity.

"Lord Hugo writes to inform His Grace, with his apologies, that Lord Hugo and Miss Penelope Montgomery are on their way to Gretna Green to be married and will return to Gaitskill Castle as soon as the deed is safely accomplished."

With a gratified sigh, the dowager relaxed back into her chair. "It is as I had hoped. What about the wagering in the servants' hall, Teasdale? How did you do?"

"Quite well, I thank you, your grace." Teasdale bowed again. "The news of this morning's elopement was well-received. Miss Philippa—I mean to say, her grace the Duchess of Kendal—has always been well-liked in the household."

"Thank you, Teasdale. Be certain to have the maids freshen up the unused dressing room that adjoins Lord Hugo’s suite in anticipation of his return with Lady Hugo.”

“Of course, your grace.” The butler looked almost insulted she would think he could forget such a thing.

“That will be all."

Teasdale bowed one last time and left the room, closing the door behind himself and allowing the dowager a moment to privately send her thanks heavenward.

"All's well that ends well," she said aloud, and smiled.