Page 84 of Demonic Affliction

I was testing you. If you could not survive the journey to the core, then you would not survive the assimilation of our souls. I needed to see if your vessel was strong enough.

I don’t care what you needed! You still tricked me! Used me! I push back with everything I have. I shove against that invisible force, teeth clenched, my fingernails digging bloodied crescents in my palms. I will not allow the serafyn to take anything more from me. Not my mind, not my body, and not my spirit.

Stop throwing this tantrum and give me control.

Its power presses with more insistence, and the fire ants turn to real fire, racing across my skin, singeing everything in its path.

With the last of the air in my lungs, I manage to push out one last, defiant cry.

“No!”

The serafyn sighs. Give in, Willow. My power will tear your body apart unless you give me control.

I shake my head, unable to speak through the pain. I… It hurts.

I know. I am sorry, little human. Just give in, and it will all be better.

For one moment, the pain muddles my mind, and I find myself considering it. Then, I look to the side, taking in my mates’ worried faces. With one glance, I remember who I am and what I stand for.

And you know what? Fuck. That. I have been through hell and back. I have seen and done things no decent human woman should ever have to experience. I have frozen my ass off for too long, eaten too few good meals, been covered in too many strange substances, and lived through too many harrowing experiences to let my journey end here.

I fucking refuse, dammit.

No, I tell the serafyn. No, I will not give in.

I feel the serafyn growing frustrated. This is ridiculous. Just… just give in!

Never.

There is an ancient-sounding growl deep in the recesses of my mind. A shiver runs down my spine, and I’m terrified, but I don’t break.

Instead, I think of everything I had to go through to get here, and everything I have gained along the way. I think of the pain following the cheating and betrayal of Nathan and Kimberly. I think of this strange world, and all the fascinating things I have seen and learned. I think of my newfound friendship with Dagny, and my strange, fluffy companion, Kevin. I think of Sasu, Circe, and Rufus, and my special relationship with Noox.

I think of many things, but most of all, I think about the unlikely, inexplicable, wonderful love I found with my demon mates. Rhune, Nyx, Dravik, and Cin…

Now that I know what it means to love them, I cannot imagine a life without them. I don’t want to.

Ever since I arrived in this world, I have been reminded that I am weak, that my human body is fragile. And you know what? They’re all right.

I may not be as fearsome as a demon, or as powerful as a serafyn. I do not possess Vhalthor’s reckless bravery, nor do I have Dagny’s sheer magical prowess.

I may be weak and fragile, and all of the things they've said. But I am a woman, and I am strong in the ways that matter. In my heart, and in my mind, and in my willingness to sacrifice—to fight for what I love to the very bitter end. That’s what makes me powerful. That's what makes me special.

The serafyn doesn’t realize it, and likely never has. But this day, she will understand exactly how frightening a human woman can truly be.

I let out a sound that’s somewhere between warrior cry and tortured scream, and it does not belong to me. It feels like I’m being dipped in acid, like all my ligaments are being stretched and torn apart by the power. It is agony. It is too much.

I don't give in. I never will. Never. Never…never…never.

Dammit, Willow! The serafyn’s voice is pitched now, frantic with uncertainty. Just give up!

I shake my head, a demented laugh pouring from my open mouth as I stare up at that ominous red tree. You’ll have to… kill me first.

I feel that at any moment now, I will burst into a million pieces. I don't have long left. I’m really going to die. But my God, it will be worth it.

I slump boneless to the ground, savoring the feel of the ice against my flame-coated skin. This is it. This is the end. Goodbye Rhune. Nyx. Dravik. Cin… I’m sorry. Sorry I was not strong enough. Sorry I was not brave enough. Sorry that I was… not enough.

My vision goes white at the edges, and I allow my eyes to slide closed, giving up the fight, succumbing to the dark, to the blissful, painless nothing.