Page 121 of Goode Tidings

CHAPTER 55

Eden

Justin's still here. It's not like I thought he would disappear while I was out front saying goodbye to Callum, but a girl can hope.

He turns to look at me when I walk in. He has one ankle crossed over the opposite knee, and an arm flung over the back of the couch. Callum's couch.

"You're flushed," he says. There's no trace of the disgusted tone he's been using with me all day. He's resolute now.

"Ok." There are plenty of other retorts in my head, and every one of them will escalate this conversation. Nothing positive will come from it, so I choose the easy route the way I always do with him.

"You don't see it as weird?" He's facing forward now, the question floating out into the empty living room. It looks so different without Callum and Oliver playing cards on the ground, me curled up with my knitting or crochet, and a fire going in the fireplace.

"Your parents have been divorced for two decades. He is as related to you as almost every other person on this planet. So, no, I don't see it as weird."

Justin's quiet, his head slowly bobbing as he assembles his thoughts. "Marrying Callum's mom was the worst decision my dad ever made. It changed everything in my life. I was so relieved when they divorced, thinking I was going to get my dad back. But I never did. He was never the same, and then he died."

I'm tired and I don't want to be on my feet anymore, so I walk around the couch to sit on the spot Callum vacated. That's when I see the nearly empty bottle of wine. A bottle I know was unopened. Justin guzzled it when I went outside.

It's not bad that this vulnerability is being delivered by liquid courage, but I wish we'd covered this years ago. Justin brushed over this part of his life. If I'd known about all this, it would've at least helped me understand the choices he made.

"Callum and his mom ruined my dad, Eden." Justin looks at me. I'm close enough now to see the red wine stain in the dry skin across his lower lip. The disgust is mine now, blooming across my stomach. "What if he ruins you and Oliver, too? And then you hate me, the same way my dad did?"

The question is so overdramatic I could scream. The misplaced blame on Callum and his mom is silly.

Justin's dad was less involved in Oliver's life as Justin has been. But I remember in the first few months of Oliver's life, Justin's dad came to meet him. Justin had been an immature asshole during my pregnancy, no-showing for doctor visits and then stumbling into the door of our tiny apartment three days later. But once Oliver was born, Justin had straightened up. I'd started thinking that maybe things were going to be alright, that we could work on being a family. But then Justin's dad held Oliver, looked right at Justin, and said Are you sure you're cut out for this?

In hindsight, I wish I'd told him off and defended Justin. Kicked his dad out of our apartment. Anything to make him see that his dad's lack of confidence in him had nothing to do with Justin at all.

"Callum is a good man who cares for me, and more importantly, he cares for Oliver. You were there today. You saw how he acted when we heard about Oliver's appendicitis. He's the one who maintained a clear head. He drove us to the hospital. He stayed all day."

Justin leans forward, hands clasping on his knees.

"Whatever happened to you or Callum or your parents back then, happened back then. It's not a part of my today. Not for me, or Callum. But for you? It seems whatever happened with your dad has been controlling your life for a long time."

He's nodding, looking at the carpet.

Rubbing at the bridge of my nose, I ask, "Why did you come to Snowflake?"

He shrugs. "I was in Thailand, and things weren't going well for me. And then I thought what the hell am I doing here when I have a family in Arizona? So I booked a flight. Came home. Got in my car and drove up here."

There's no use in picking apart anything he just said, so I ask, "When are you leaving again?"

He sits back. "I'm not."

I give him a droll look. "Come on. I know your back better than your front by now."

"I'm serious. I'm not leaving."

"You're staying in Snowflake?" My voice turns panicky. Justin coming back changes things for me. I'll need to find somewhere else to live. Callum, too.

"No. This is your place now. I'd never come here and demand it back."

My panic dissipates. "You'll go back to Phoenix, then?"

He nods. "And I'll come up here to see Oliver."

I'm terrified to say too much, to scare him away. But I need to know how serious he is about this. I can't have him selling verbal snake oil to Oliver, issuing promises he'll never follow through on.