Page 365 of Eight of Swords, Part Two

He just… forgot.

But here in the water, he remembers everything.

He feels all of himself, every piece of his soul harmonising as the water washes away even years of doubt, the grief of a life hard lived and the loss caved deeper than memory can sustain.

He’s Julian Penhalyx.

The ocean is his mother.

The moon is his brother.

The earth is his sister.

The sky… oh, the sky.

White sunshine makes the dark of space into the purest, clearest blue he’s ever seen. Not the pale glow of eerie hell, not the shadow of prison made to break him. Truest blue is the absence of darkness.

Yet when the warm sun dips, the starry sky will rush in just like the water and Julian will smile, for that glittering, silky dark is the man he loves.

He forgot everything.

But he let go of nothing.

He carried it all, grew strong off the weight and never asked why.

Julian pushes forward and dives under.

Watersong surrounds him.

The ocean moves through him.

And he just knows that nothing can ever be wrong when he’s in the water because this… this is who he is. This is his certainty, his East.

His reason.

His why.

Him.

Long ago, mother whispers in Watersong, there was just one cell in the sea.

Julian smiles as he swims, no need to surface, no need to breathe.

This is his home, and his body has evolved beyond it, for the land is too lovely and full of wonders, but he will always be welcome back home.

There is nothing to fear.

There is no reason to worry.

For at the end, he’ll stand on this same beach with his feet in the water and mother will show him all the moments he had and he’ll understand, just like he does now, that life is made to be lived joyously and energy is the guide and love is the music and free will is the rhythm and death is only the start of something new, somewhere else, and he can choose.

He is Julian Penhalyx.

He can always choose.

The water becomes a rush of liquid diamonds, and each bubble makes a chime and the sunlight streaks through the waves, light rippling.

Deeper he goes until a hand reaches down, gleaming and warm as it dips into the water, and a voice asks, ‘Are you ready now?’