Page 200 of Eight of Swords, Part Two

And when he closes his eyes, all he can see is Luca wrapped in bandages.

He can’t remember the last thing Luca said to him.

Something about… keeping count?

It’s just gone. Kade feels utterly useless, so guilty it’s gutting him.

Once decent, he opens his door.

Lachlan is hovering. ‘Please.’

‘Not now.’

‘Just for a minute.’

Kade grits his teeth, steps aside.

Lachlan comes inside swiftly. ‘Thanks.’

‘Talk fast.’

‘What happened to your friend was my fault.’

Kade so badly wants to agree, lean into every bit of grief and anger he has and weaponise it against the man who led them blindly to tea with Vasily Sorrenko, but facts ultimately win out.

Riley had already warned about the Resets.

Vasily did help them.

Luca is one of Iron Star’s best.

And Iron Star makes its own laws and enforces them with violence.

Luca, like everyone else, knew what he signed up for.

‘Look, much as I feel like shit, I don’t want to let the people who actually drew blood off the hook either. Internal blame is circular.’ Kade closes his eyes, breathing slowly. ‘Luca’s alive. That’s what matters for now.’

‘You’re blaming yourself.’

‘I made the choice. It’s not blame; it’s responsibility. I can carry it.’

‘I don’t want you to.’

‘Responsibility and blame are different.’ Kade sits on the end of his bed. ‘I hate that you lied to me.’

Lachlan kneels in front of him. ‘Me too.’

‘Don’t do it again.’

Dark grey eyes move between his own. ‘I won’t.’

Kade’s bottom lip trembles. He has no words to shape what he feels.

Lachlan seems to hear it anyway, leans up and hugs him. ‘I’ve got you.’

‘I… I think I had a dream about you.’

A strong hand slips into his hair at the back. ‘Yeah?’