Page 37 of Compulsion

“So will I. Trust me.”

Did I? His smile was tight and the glint in his eyes made my mouth dry. He was very assured, very calm. And so fucking handsome. “You….” This was going to sound bloody ridiculous. “Seve, you will be careful, won’t you?”

He laughed. “You’re being melodramatic again, Max. Of course I will! But can’t you stay longer? Let’s have another coffee.” Let’s go back to bed, came the subtext in the sparkling eyes.

I could feel my traitorous body responding to him again. I mustered up a grin, evaded his outstretched hand before it reached me, and I left the flat. He shut the door quietly behind me.

The lift crawled all the way down to the lobby. I imagined I could smell Seve’s seed in the claustrophobic air of it—a heady, erotic memory. I strode out of the building as confidently as I could and made my way back down onto the promenade. My journey back on the bus wasn’t going to be quite as comfortable as in Seve’s car, but that was a good thing for me at the moment. I sat in a seat at the back for the few stops to Kemptown, just letting my mind empty. The town was filling with shoppers on one side of the road and holiday visitors on the seaward side. Delivery vans and courier bikes dodged around the bus on their way to and from local businesses. I’d withdrawn so far that I nearly missed the stop at the bottom of Jack and Louis’s road but rang the bell at the last minute.

I stood looking up their road toward the flat I’d come to call home in the last six months. And then I started to climb the hill. After all, where the hell else did I have to go?

Chapter Sixteen

I HEARD Jack and Louis coming back home just as I was trying to fit a final pair of tennis shoes into my bag. I’d washed, body and hair, and dressed in comfortable T-shirt and sweats. I’d called work, had a longer and more awkward conversation with my boss, and chatted with a couple of the other guys who were in the office. Then I’d packed up my pitiful wardrobe and a couple of personal items. I was sure Jack and Louis would let me come back and pick anything else up later.

The guys were earlier than usual—I’d expected to be gone by the time they both came back to the flat. Louis’s work schedules were erratic unless he was on set, but Jack usually worked a full office-hours day. A glance at the clock told me it was only three in the afternoon. I took a deep breath. No problem. I probably owed them for some food this week, anyway, so it was better I settled up before I went. I wondered where I’d left my wallet, and patted around on the bed to find it.

“Max, what the hell are you doing?”

Fuck. Jack at his most assertive, standing in my doorway. Well, the soon-not-to-be-my-doorway. It’d be their spare room again, like it was before I came back and disturbed their life all over. “Don’t make a fuss, Jack. I’ll pay what housekeeping I owe, then I’m on my way. There’s a room going at the same place as one of the guys at work; I can bed down there for the time being. I’ve taken the rest of the day off to get settled in. Eventually I want to look for my own place, but I can’t afford it yet. If it’s okay with you, I’ll come back and collect anything else at the weekend. Or while you’re at work, if you prefer.”

“No, you bloody well won’t.” He looked shocked.

“Look, please, I know I deserve the abuse, but just let me go quietly—”

“Go?”

Now Louis was in the doorway as well. I’d have to be a damn shadow to get out between the pair of them. They had me trapped. Were they looking for some kind of fight?

“You can’t go anywhere yet!” Louis cried. “The food’s already on the table. And I only buy the sticky BBQ sauce ribs for you, neither of us likes them.”

“For God’s sake!” I flushed deeply. “I’m happy to be thrown out, but don’t expect me to eat a hearty meal before I go. Stick the bloody things in a bag and I’ll take them with me, if you’re that anally retentive to care either way.”

“What’s he talking about?” Louis turned to Jack with genuine surprise on his face. “Thrown out?”

“We’re having a late lunch, Max,” Jack said. He seemed to be struggling to keep his voice steady. “All of us together. Did you forget? I swapped shifts with Martin at work so I could leave early.”

Louis nodded vigorously. “Then we’re all going to watch that new sci-fi film like we promised ourselves. Later on, the Vs are expecting us in town for a drink for their birthday. Or birthdays? I never know who or which is celebrating.” Louis was gabbling, startled and bemused, but with me, not the Vs. “Where are you going?”

“He’s not going anywhere,” Jack said. His quiet, firm voice was back, the one I called his “practice” for his future day in court as an expert witness. He planted himself more squarely in the doorway and frowned at me. “You’re not going anywhere, Max. Well, if you really want to, I’ll listen to the reasons. But we’re not throwing you out. Dammit, why would we do that? You’re our friend. We like you here.”

“Jack certainly does. He watches you in the shower, you know,” Louis grumbled.

“Yes, I told you that, didn’t I?” Despite the tension of the moment, Jack smiled mischievously back at him. “And don’t you just rise to the bait every time.” His fingers reached out and ghosted over Louis’s groin.

“Bastard,” Louis said fondly.

There was unambiguous, comfortably familiar lust in their expressions, and I envied them for their devotion—but they still weren’t getting out of my way. “I lied to you,” I said. I’d steeled myself to leave; I wasn’t sure what was happening here. “You had no idea what shit I’d been up to in London, how I fucked up my life. You don’t need the extra hassle. I need to get out of here and sort things out for myself.”

“Shut the hell up, you stupid arse,” Louis announced cheerfully. “We know who you are—of course we bloody well do—and we say that what’s past is past. You’re no different today than you were then.” He narrowed his eyes, looking me up and down. “Well, a bit taller, and with muscle definition I can’t, unfortunately, compete with.” He ignored Jack’s punch to his arm. “Just come and eat and keep us company through the film. Then if you don’t want to come out with the Vs, you can come back here and put all those damn things back in the cupboard, then take an early night so’s I can drag Jack to bed and screw his provocative little brains out.”

“Not so little, you damn bimbo,” Jack growled in response.

I stood there as they moved away from the door and back down to the living room, laughing and gasping dirty little promises that I doubted would wait to be honored until after the film. One of my tennis shoes was still dangling from my hand. I was more than a little stunned, and not just because I knew I’d probably have to move a few rows away from them in the cinema.

Jack reappeared halfway up the stairs, calling up to me. His expression was serious now. “We meant it, Max. We want you to stay. This is your home now.”

“The things I’ve done—”