Page 22 of The Tourist

I wanted tosmile again, but I didn’t want him to misconstrue my humour. “Imerely wanted us to have enough uninterrupted, personal time totalk this through. We’ll leave here soon, go back home. Just assoon as you understand.”

His eyesnarrowed. “Understand what?” He tried to shift away from thebarrels, pulling himself along on his arse, but the effort wasobviously too much for him. He fell back against the wall, panting.“You’ve g-given me something, haven’t you?”

“Certainsteps were necessary.” I frowned at his petulance. He’d been aheavy, awkward passenger, propped against my shoulder, as we’dstumbled away from the park. My car was parked at least a mileaway, and he’d been almost hysterical when I confronted him. I’dnever have got him back there without someone noticing andchallenging me. So, it had been a stroke of luck, catching up withhim so near to the bar—and a perfect hideaway, somewhere to keephim until he saw sense. Or I had to make him see it.

“You fucker!You drugged me!”

I couldn’tremember Ricky ever shouting at me. I was sure he’d never had thenerve. “I don’t like your attitude. I’m disappointed in you,Ricky.”

“Like Ifucking c-care.” His voice was shaky, but his words clear. Hepeered around him. “This is the bar, isn’t it? The cellar. How thehell did you get in here?”

I didn’tbother answering. He always carried a spare set of keys to the barwith his own set for the flat, for the nights his far-too-casualboss left him to lock up. Did he think I hadn’t noticed? I had nodesire to visit this squalid establishment any more than necessary,to keep tabs on Ricky. But it had been useful to know I could usethis place, if I wished to. I never knew when I might need anundisturbed place to visit, late at night.

That word sentan unpleasant shiver down my back. I had no idea why.

“You can’tkeep me here.” Ricky was pulling himself forward again, trying togrip the shiny metal barrels. His hands slipped, his palms sweatydespite the cold down here. “I want to leave, right now. D-Dan’sexpecting me.”

Somethingclenched instinctively inside me, like a fist curling around myintestines. Dan. Bile bubbled low in my throat. “I don’t think so.You didn’t call him before you left the flat, nor did you use yourphone on the way… here.”

His eyeswidened again, his focus returning. “You don’t knowthat.”

I shrugged. “Iknow you, Ricky. A man of reaction, not pro-action. And it didn’tlook like you parted on speaking terms.”

“You’ve beenwatching me? Watching me and Dan?”

Dan. The namejarred again in my ears like the harsh reverberation of a tin drum.I didn’t dignify that with a reply. “You’re not what he’s used to,I daresay. You’re too volatile. Too challenging, too disturbing.I’d say he’s thinking right now he’s glad to be rid of you.” Ismiled freely now. “Though it’ll probably take him a while to workthat into coherent thought.”

Ricky wasscrambling on the floor, trying to get up. “Fuck you, Calder. He’sworth… he’s fucking… he’s the best.” He pulled himself to his kneesand started coughing. I’d need to take him in hand before hestarted crashing. “Help me.”

I hunkereddown abruptly in front of him, startling him. “But that’s just whatI can give you, Ricky. Proper help. Proper attention.” I frowned athim. “Your behaviour is childish, and your language appears to haveslipped back into the gutter. But we can redress that with time.You need me.”

He stared at me. “No, I don’t.What the hell for?”

“You forgethow well I know you.” And I slapped him.

His headjerked back and he gasped. He looked, suddenly, veryfrightened.

And me? Icould feel the rush of relief and excitement through my veins. Mypalm stung from the impact and my cock thickened inside mytrousers. I ran a hand down his arm, feeling the stubble of goosebumps, the taut definition of his muscles. He was a beautifulcreature. So beautiful.

“You feelthat, Ricky, don’t you?” I didn’t wait for him to answer, justleant in against him, dragging my hand over his belly, ignoring thesudden tightening of his muscles, then down between his thighs. Ilicked my lips. “The shock through your whole body. The strength ofmy blow. Your weakness. Are you hard yet?”

“Calder, youbast—”

With my otherhand, I slapped him again. He rocked back on his heels. I think hesobbed. I reached out quickly and caught him, my hand around theback of his neck. I tugged him close. I knew he could feel mybreath on his face. He half closed his eyes and lookedaway.

Unusuallystubborn. The skin on his cheek had blossomed, shiny and red fromthe impact of my blows. I’d split his lip. A small bubble of bloodwelled against the ruddy flesh, the fine line of his mouthdistorted by a small but ugly wound. With a wash of pure lust ashot as steam, I wanted him right here and now. My hand hovered overmy belt buckle.

No!

I dropped myhand, a little surprised at the vehemence of that thought. As ifsomething inside had challenged me at the last minute, calling mycontrol into question. Impossible, of course. But there couldn’t bea proper scene, anyway. Not here, not without equipment. In mymind, I ran over the toys I would use on him back at my flat, thethings that had lain unused for several months now. Waiting forhim. I smiled to myself.

And shuddered.I startled myself with the force of it, even as I pushed theunwanted response aside.

Pressing mylips to his ear, I whispered, “You understand now, don’t you? It’swhat you need. What you crave.”

“No!” Hecouldn’t push me away—but he tried.

For the firsttime, I hesitated. I was still gripping him by the neck but Ipulled back, staring into his eyes. “You want me, Ricky. You’reinto the scene as much as I am. We’re a complement…”