Page 18 of Blissful Devotion

Emotions I thought I’d buried in the past, along with our brother, the man who traded me away at the ripe age of nineteen to a gang he owed a debt to…

A man who was willing to let his little brother take the fall, be fucked and abused and whatever else they wanted for two weeks before Vince and Nathan found me and got me out of there…

That’s who has Kat and our unborn child, and it’s all my fault.

Lorenzo is my nightmare, and I’ve just handed him the most precious thing in the world to not just me but all of us.

I’m in hell.

Nathan gets me the wastebasket seconds before I violently puke up nothing but stomach acid and alcohol at the thought of what he might do to her, and the memories of a time I usually do a good job of pretending never happened.

Isit unmoving, unable to think straight as I continue to look up at him. I’m pretty sure I’m in shock.

“At least they picked someone worth looking at.” He turns my head to the left and then to the right before I hiss and try to pull away from a sudden sharp pain in my temple.

He lets his hand drop, and I don’t miss the blood that stains his fingers when he pulls back or the look of disgust on his face before he quickly wipes his hand on his pants.

“I think she might have a concussion, sir,” the guy with the mask says from beside him, his voice clinical, and it takes me a second to realize he’s talking about me.

Crap, he might be right.

“Hm, I’m not sure I give a fuck if she does. While Nathan and Alex are good enough people, I don’t see them going out of their way to come for her,” Lorenzo says, looking me over as if trying to figure out what I am, making my skin crawl.

He’s wrong, of course. I have no doubt they will come for me, or at least try to. Even if I were nobody but Addison’s nanny, I’m sure they would try, but something tells me they won’t be giving up, and I don’t think it’s my possible concussion.

I’m not sure if I’m happy about that or sad.

They’re going to put so much time and effort into finding me, and I almost wish they wouldn’t.

Whoever this guy is, he’s bad news. I knew that from the moment I heard him talk. Something in his eyes is the same as Carter and Trevor.

He’s unhinged, and, given the setting, the guards, the guys with face tattoos, and that he was willing to ram our car to get to Addy, the child who was his original target…

Yeah, I don’t want them anywhere near her.

I hate that nobody ever told me about him, but it doesn’t take a genius to see why they wouldn’t. I’m sure they never intended to have anything to do with him. I know I wouldn’t.

I could probably tell him who I am. He might treat me better, but I think I’d rather he believe I’m nobody.

It’s safer for them, for Addy.

For the baby.

“Well, until you want to talk, you can sit there,” he hisses, turning and heading toward the door without so much as a glance back. “Let me know if she decides to talk,” he says to someone I can’t see, and then he’s gone, the door falling closed behind him and the light going with it.

My mind reels, my head spins, and my eyes fill with tears as too many emotions try to take a front row and overwhelm me even more.

When darkness pulls me under, I welcome it, even if only for a small break from the nightmare that my life has become.

We’re missing something, and I don’t mean Kat.

Something is going on, something I don’t understand, but Nathan and Father do. I can see it in their eyes.

Whatever it is has pushed Father to drink more than double what he usually does, which was already too much.

“Hey, Des.” He's in Kat’s room, sitting on the edge of her bed, looking off into space, Ruby at his feet, somehow looking just as sad. I move into the room since he doesn’t seem to have heard me or even realize I’m here.

I’d been looking all over for him.