Page 88 of Poet & Protector

I moved away from him. Turning, I folded my arms and pressed my forehead against them as I leaned on the scaffolding, closing my eyes tight.

My breath was coming too fast. I had to calm down or I was going to hyperventilate.

How the hell am I supposed to calm down?

For years I had sensed Logan as a threat, but what seemed like a distant, potential danger was suddenly a tornado sweeping me up and carrying me away. It was happening so quickly I couldn’t get my bearings.

When Nev approached, I pushed off the scaffolding and tried to maintain the space between us. I couldn’t look at him.

“No.” Nev took my hands and pulled me close. His arms wrapped around me. “Don’t hide from me. Let me hold you.”

I was shaking uncontrollably.

“Easy.” His hand moved gently up and down my back. “I’ve got you, Mason. Just breathe. That’s all you need to do. Breathe.”

We stood like that a long time, with my face buried in his neck and Nev murmuring soothing words until I could breathe normally again.

When at last I pulled back, he allowed me to stand slightly apart from him, but he kept his hand on my lower back.

“I need you to tell me what’s going on,” Nev said gently. “What did Logan mean when he said you were supposed to find him? When did he talk to you?”

I had to look away from him again. “Yesterday. After lunch.”

Staring at the floor, I told him about Logan’s invitation and its insinuation. I let all the suspicion and dread I’d carried about the Bane heir for so long spill out of me. It was a secret that had been eating at me more than I’d admitted to myself. Telling Nev everything was a relief, but it was also terrifying because naming my fears made them real.

Nev was silent for a long time, heavy bass beats reverberating through our bodies as this new reality sank in.

“I’ll kill him,” he said finally, quietly.

I turned to face him. “Please don’t say that. Please.”

He didn’t reply.

“The only reason you’re still alive is because this is a game Logan enjoys playing.” I gripped his upper arms as I spoke. “Don’t challenge him again. It’s not worth your life.”

He looked away. “You said he hadn’t approached you before. Why now?”

“I have no idea,” I replied. “Maybe because we’re older. Or there’s something else going on that I don’t know about. But he’s so confident. No hesitation at all.”

Nev nodded grimly. “Yeah. That part is surprising.”

“Did you know about Logan?”

“That he’s gay?” Nev’s brow furrowed. “Kind of. It’s been a long-time rumor among the Banes. No one gave it much thought because Logan’s never shown any interest in Guardians. You’ve seen what he’s like at school. I would never have guessed he’s been fixated on you for so long.”

“Do you think Efron knows?” I was holding out hope that Logan’s father might be a force I could leverage to protect myself.

“Maybe,” Nev replied. He squeezed his eyes shut and rubbed his temples as if warding off a sudden headache. “I hate to say it, but I’m not sure it matters. Efron doesn’t police Logan’s behavior if it isn’t interfering with Keeper business. You know about Efron and Sabine. That’s the model Logan’s working from. I wish I could pretend it wasn’t.”

“But I’m not a Bane,” I argued, desperate for a lifeline. “Even if Efron doesn’t care about Logan…wanting me, I should be off limits, shouldn’t I? Lumine and Efron are both territorial about their packs and they respect each other’s authority.”

Nev let out a long sigh and opened his eyes. “You should be off limits. I don’t understand what’s making Logan think he can get away with this…”

“But it’s obvious he thinks he can,” I finished.

When Nev didn’t say anything, the floor seemed to tilt beneath my feet, the horror of it crashing down on me all at once. I stumbled back, fighting for balance and losing. I ended up on my knees.

Nev crouched beside me. “Mason.”