Page 111 of Throne of the Wolf Queen

Pablo approached, his head low. He licked the gore from my cheek and I gripped him, pulled him close and lay a kiss to his head. I almost laughed as the damn rug sneezed in my face. Pain raged through me as I shivered and I knew soon I’d be nothing more than a corpse for Sorrow to take. But still I breathed. And with each breath, I could buy her a fraction more time.

The glistening hearts caught my eye. If I could get those hearts, could I control her? To own the heart is to possess the God. I ruffled the wolf’s head.

‘You—’ The pain lanced through me as I pressed forward. But I’d not fail my Sorrow again. ‘Distract… her. For Sorrow.’

He slammed his forehead against mine, leapt over the crumbling rocks and grabbed the empress’s skirts. Burning lit across me as I pressed the stump of my arm down, pushed myself forward, biting my cheek to hold back the screams rising through my chest. Ifan rose, only to burst into a cloud of dust. His name left my dry lips. But Sorrow needed me. I’d earn Ifan’s vengeance. My body tumbled over the jagged remains of a column, the edges slicing into my chest. I barked out a laugh as I glanced up. The empress was unsure what to do as the puppy she’d so desired clawed her skirts. My fingers skimmed the chains of the hearts. Damn, digging in, gathering the final dregs of my strength, I threw my body forward, the stump pounding with pain. Not enough. Further. Just a bit more…

Pablo yelped. The sickening sound of his body crashing, but I couldn’t look. Screaming, I pushed myself forward. I barely felt her boot slam against my trembling fingers.

‘Mine.’ The glee in her tone stole my hope, crumbled and scattered it, adding to the ash.

The empress rose above me. Her hair, wild and blinding, thrashed around her as she set her pitch-black eyes upon me. I was nothing but shivers as my blood seeped away. Lightning crackled and fizzled at her edges. My breath rattled, caught. But the world? The world had stilled.

The trickle of warm blood spilled down my chin and I stumbled, fell, as I forced my waning strength into ending her. Her mouth worked, but my mind failed to catch her words, fissures already dissected her pallid flesh. Just like the Vyrium, she’d taken what wasn’t hers and soon, she’d be nothing. Hot blood coated my throat as Asher’s cry pierced my mind.

The empress had torn into my life, taken all I held dear. My mother. Ifan. The love of my people. The people I’d sworn to protect. And for what? Had she truly believed she could take her place with the Gods? All this. All this devastation had been for nothing.

She knelt, lifting my chin, smearing bubbling crimson across my chilled flesh.

She’d dared to take my Sorrow and as she bent towards me, victory swam in her eyes. An almost dead God she may be, I thought, slipping in my warm blood, but she’d last long enough to kill my Sorrow. Take the lives of those I loved.

‘Still vexing me, Asmar?’ She dug her fingers into my jaw, tilted my head so she could watch the light leaving my eyes.

My body shuddered as though I’d been plunged into ice. My life flooded the floor of a forgotten temple and she knew there was nothing I could do. The empress laughed, my eyes tracking a sheaf of rotting skin floating from her cheek.

But if this was my final moment on Eusis, it wouldn’t be her shattered face I saw. No. I smiled, delighting in the confusion sweeping across her features as I pictured my Sorrow – her brown eyes, her fire, her unrelenting love – and gave her one final gift. The gift of life, of love.

‘Do you wonder what’s on the other side now I’ve killed the Gods?’ She smirked, the world receding with each pained blink. ‘What waits for you on the other side now, Asmar?’

I smiled, picturing the life my love would live without me. The empress narrowed her soulless eyes.

‘I…’ I choked, spat out blood. ‘I don’t know… but…’ I took a final, ragged breath. ‘I know we’ll find out together.’

With the vision of two children tearing through corridors, hand in hand, the boy and his girl swirling through my mind, I lunged forward, ripped the hearts from her hands and threw them to where my Sorrow fought. And knowing I hadn’t failed her at the end, welcomed the cold embrace of death.

CHAPTER 44

SORROW

Nothing makes me smile like watching Sorrow and the exiled prince. Their adoration is so like the one we shared, Gabe. Oh, how I wish you’d lived to see them! Two kindred souls brought together through tragedy. Romero despises them, keeps trying to tear them apart, but as long as there’s breath in my body, I won’t allow him to spoil what they have. Our daughter deserves a different fate to ours. She deserves to grow old with the one she truly loves.

​— ​HIDDEN JOURNALS OF QUEEN MERCY

I didn’t need to see to understand why Asher’s breath hitched, why the empress screamed. Why my gifts crawled back. The darkness paled around the fringes of my vision, pooling into the crevices, splitting my heart. A heart that thundered a lonesome tattoo, her matching echo gone.

The violet threads shuddered, as though even they knew I’d destroy the world if they were to take Matthias.

I heard the sob of our captain, felt the solid nudge of the wolf against my hip, the dull clash of the hearts in his mouth.

The cackle of Delphine.

This was my final moment, a sweeping opportunity. I pictured the faces of all those I loved, all those who buried into my reluctant soul and loved me back. My beloved wolf, my mentor and the wife she adored. Enfys and Mama, Asher and Skye. Fuck, even the spoilt, little brother who’d barely gained a chance to live and become a king. And Matthias, tears tracked through the sweat, blood and ash coating my skin. The man who’d loved me without condition. Who’d fought Gods for me. I blew out the last of my fear, raised my chin and placed every sliver of hope into my threads.

The empress was not divine. Even as the temple decayed, the mount crumbled, she was still Delphine. And I possessed a gift greater than those Evella blessed me with. A gift worth fighting for.

Love.

I inhaled, a ragged, desperate prayer, and tore open the core holding back my gifts. Silver and purple threaded, weaved and I gave in to them. I no longer cared about being enough. I was Sorrow fucking Elmswood, Deviant, daughter of the Gods and I would be her retribution, her justice, her ruin.