Page 61 of Off Sides

“Where the hell were you?” my grandfather asks me.

They want me to beg and plead. To say it’s all a lie. Would they it go if I did that? Maybe. I’m convinced they’ve been living in denial for quite some time now. Happy to ignore the fact that I’ve been slowly dying inside for years.

“Where’s Mom?” I ask, not bothering to take off my coat. I don’t really think there’s a need to do that.

“She’s at church, praying for her deviant son,” my dad grits out.

I nod my head slowly because of course she is. All I’ve ever been to them is a problem. Something to fix.

“Where. The. Hell. Were. You?” my brother stands up as he asks, approaching me.

Maybe I’m tired of all of this, trying to get them to love me for who I am. Tired of doing what they say. Maybe it’s Jonah’s unyielding love for me. I don’t really know, but I square my shoulders and look my brother right in the eyes when I say, “At my boyfriend’s house.”

I don’t have time to react before his meaty fist connects with my cheek, making it feel like my face just exploded. “Don’t you ever say that shit again in this house!”

My father and grandfather just sit there, useless as always.

I don’t say anything as raise my fist and punch Curtis right in the nose. Hard. Hearing the satisfying crack and seeing the blood pour down. I’ve wanted to do that for so long.

Now my father jumps up, getting in-between us with his arms stretched out. But he’s only looking at me. “You get the hell out of my house. Don’t come back. You’re no longer a Duke.”

“Fine by me,” I spit, “I never wanted to be one anyway.”

I pull open the door and leave. There’s no point in trying to fix it. I don’t want that life. I never did.

I get into my truck and start it up, thinking about the promise I made Jonah before I left and gingerly touching my swollen cheek, seeing that there’s blood but not a lot.

I will go to him, but I need a minute. I have nothing with me, except the bag I packed last night and my truck. I have a bank account with a sizeable amount in it from the summers I’ve worked at Duke Drilling, but it feels tainted.

I know no one else has access to it. It’s solely mine and mine alone. I’m not stupid, I need that money, and I’ll likely use it, but for right now, I ignore it.

I can’t exactly borrow Jonah’s clothes—no way they’d fit me. And no way in hell am I going to go back into that house. I’m done. I’m sure they’d be all too happy to act like I never existed, and honestly . . . fine by me.

They didn’t deserve me.

I drive around for a long time, out to the lake before going back into town and parking in front of Jonah’s. I haven’t checked my phone. I’m sure he’s sent some messages.

I hate that I know I’ve worried him, but I needed the time to let it sink in. I don’t have my parents or grandfather or brother anymore.

But I really am oddly okay with it. Because I have family still. It just so happens that they aren’t blood-related.

I finally go to the front door, and I’m not at all surprised when it tears open and Jonah is standing there, wrapping his arms around me before I can even ring the doorbell. He pulls back, holding onto my shoulder and looks at my cheek. “Those motherfuckers.”

“Ummm . . . . . Uncle Jonah said a bad word!” Ruby says.

“It’s valid,” Jenna says, coming over and gently sweeping her hand over my cheek. I hiss at the contact, even though I try to hide it, and she pulls back. “We should call the cops.”

I shake my head immediately. “No.”

“Calvin . . .” Coach starts.

“No,” I say firmly because that would just mean more time with them, dealing with them. “I’m done,” I say definitively. “I’m done with them.”

Jonah wraps his arms around my neck, being careful with my face. “Okay,” he says softly.

“You can stay here for as long as you want,” Jenna says. “We can turn the office into your room.”

“No, that’s okay,” I say because no way am I turning their world upside down. “It’s just temporary. I have enough money to can rent some place.”