Page 35 of Off Sides

“Invite him over for dinner tonight. Jenna is making breakfast for dinner, my fave.”

I grin, but sadness takes over, and my shoulders hunch. “He won’t come over anymore.”

“Why not?”

I shrug, not that I actually want to tell my big brother about kissing a guy, but part of me does. I want to talk to the man I trust more than anyone on this earth about a guy that I’m falling for—who is doing his best to push me away.

And I am falling for him. It makes no sense at all. I’m supposed to just be here to play football and graduate before going to college and starting my life. I’m not supposed to be falling for a broken boy who doesn’t trust me. Who may never trust me.

But that’s exactly what I’m doing. And I can’t tell anyone about it because I refuse to out him, even if it seems to be the worst-kept secret at Big Bend High.

“He just won’t,” I say, feeling a deep sense of dread and ache in my gut I’m not sure is ever going away.

I loved spending time with him, even before I knew how well he could kiss. I loved playing games with him and just simply being in his presence. Now it feels like that’s over.

He pats me on the shoulder. “One thing I know about you, Jonah, is you never quit. Don’t give up so easily, kid.”

“You make me sound like a pushy asshole.”

He holds up his pointer finger and thumb, squeezing until they nearly touch. “Eh, just a little bit.”

I shove his shoulder playfully, and he grabs the bench, laughing and catching himself. “He doesn’t want to be friends anymore,” I say, hating how much I sound like a little kid.

“He needs a friend more than anyone I know, Jonah. Don’t let him push you away when he needs you the most.”

Okay, it’s kind of freaky how much he’s obviously picked up on. I don’t think he knows about anything other than friendship—unless Jenna let on what she thinks she knows—but I also know he means this. That he wants Calvin to have someone to talk to, even if it isn’t him.

He knows Calvin desperately needs someone.

And I really want to be that someone, if he’d only let me.

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

calvin

“Good morning!” Jonah’s voice is loud and travels as he walks up to me at my locker, leaning against someone else’s, his backpack slung over his shoulder. I don’t know what the hell he’s doing, but I just grab my books for first period and ignore him.

I can do this.

I did it all yesterday, even when he nearly knocked the shit out of Adler. Fuck, what if he’d have actually hit him? It could cost him his position on the team. Or if it didn’t, it could’ve cost Micah his job.

Doesn’t he realize by now I’m not worth it?

Why does he keep coming back?

I thought about going the same route with him as I did with Austin. But one, I could never stomach it again. Hurting someone like that? Betraying their trust? There’s no way in hell I’d do that again.

And two, I know without a doubt Jonah wouldn’t take it. He’d push me right back. He’d fight.

And there’s no way I’m going to hurt him.

But he has to leave me alone.

“You should come over after practice. I think Jenna’s making pot roast, which is really good,” he goes on, and I turn to him, dumbfounded. “Though last night, I bet you’d have really loved. She made breakfast for dinner. You ever have that?”

He looks at me like he’s waiting on me to actually answer him. I don’t. I just stare blankly in confusion.

“Pancakes. Waffles. Bacon. Sausage. Eggs. Three different types of eggs. I mean, the woman is crazy but awesome. Because it was good. I’m still full.”