Page 49 of Coming Home to Inishbeg Cove

Chapter 31

Penny

I watched the fisherman as he stood on his boat, turned his face up to the salt-scented air, and took a sniff. I could remember asking Dad, when I was a child, what they were doing, and he had explained that they were checking to see if a storm was coming. After spending years on fishing boats, their nostrils had become finely tuned to detect a change in the weather and, despite all the technological advances in shipping forecasts and storm warnings, it seemed the older fishermen still preferred to rely on their senses.

The petrol-blue ocean before me was wild and energetic. The tide was in almost as far as the sleek black rocks, and the waves crashed against the sea wall, unleashing their pent-up ferocity. A jet of sea spray suddenly arced over the wall and I quickly stepped back to avoid being soaked.

I was on my way to the café. Just as the change in the air signalled that summer was drawing to a close, so too was life in the village for me. I couldn’t shake off a heavy sense of foreboding. A feeling of impending dread had settled over me in recent days. I knew my days working in the café were numbered. I had managed to fob Joe off by telling him that Ruairí needed me to stay on for another week to see off the last of the holidaymakers, but I couldn’t prolong our return to Dublin forever. Our departure was inevitable. Even Mam and Dad seemed to have accepted that we would be leaving soon.

I tried telling myself that this was what I wanted. My old life had been great. We lived in a lovely part of Dublin, where beautiful terraces of Georgian red-bricks fronted pretty parks, safe for children to play in. We had myriad cafés, bars and bijou restaurants on our doorstep. There was every convenience, from upmarket hair salons to artisan delis. There were theatres and galleries and quirky antique markets – all things I had once thought important, yet which I hadn’t missed a bit since I had been back in the village. The thing was, before I returned to Inishbeg Cove, I had been happy with my Dublin life. I knew that once I’d had the chance to settle back in, I would like it again. I was sure of it.

To give Joe his due, he was making an effort. Although his moods were still heavily influenced by his art, I felt that he no longer saw me simply as an accessory to his life. My absence had tipped the scales a little more in my favour, and things felt more balanced between us. I really believed he was trying harder to be a better husband.

In the distance, I could see a black shape emerging from the white water. Only a lunatic would go into the water in this weather, I thought. It was probably an adrenaline-seeking surfer chasing the ultimate wave. I watched the figure for a moment and realised, as they came closer to the shore, that it was Tadgh. Surely he wasn’t fishing for crabs in this weather? He was positively mad. He knew the sea and the dangers it could pose. He had lived in this village long enough to know what it could do if you didn’t respect it. The sea could be cruel, and could turn on you faster than you could take a breath.

I waited until he had emerged from the foam and tucked his board underneath his arm. I saw that he hadn’t caught any crabs. Surely he hadn’t just gone out to surf? Even though every synapse within me told me to walk away, my feet wouldn’t move. I stood rooted to the spot, as if I had no control over my own legs. It was as though I was drawn to him by a magnetic force. I waited as he climbed the path from the cove back up towards the village.

‘Penny?’ He looked taken aback to see me when he reached the top. He ran a hand through his dark, wavy hair, sleeking it back off his face. God, he looked so good.

‘Have you got a death wish? Surely you would give the surf a miss on a day like today?’ I was angry at his cavalier attitude to the elements.

‘Best kind of day for it if you want to clear your head.’

‘If you say so…’

‘I hope you and Joe enjoyed your meal the other day?’

‘I’m sorry about that.’

‘For what?’

‘It wasn’t my idea. I know it was awkward, and I really didn’t want to bring my husband to my ex-boyfriend’s restaurant, but he really wanted to try it out and—’

‘That was all a long time ago, Penny,’ he said. ‘And you’re free to eat wherever you want.’ He shrugged, seemingly blasé about the whole thing.

I was making a fool of myself. He didn’t seem to be in the least bit bothered. Maybe I was blowing this out of all proportion. Had I really seen pain lurking in his eyes in the restaurant that day? Maybe it had been wishful thinking on my part...

‘Okay, I’ll let you at it,’ I said, turning and walking in the direction of the café, feeling mortification burn through my body with every step.

‘Penny, wait—’ he called after me.

I turned around to face him.

‘I’m sorry,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘I didn’t mean that. I know it was awkward ... for both of us.’

I nodded, feeling a strange sense of relief that it hadn’t just been me. That he had felt it too.

‘So, how’s everything with you and Joe?’ he asked.

I cringed. How was I supposed to answer that question? ‘We’re working it out.’

‘So, I guess you’ll be leaving to go back to Dublin soon?’

‘Well, Joe wants to...’

‘And you?’

‘Yeah, I do too. Although the summer here has been lovely, I’m looking forward to getting on with my life again. And Lucy is due to start playschool, so it’ll be a new start for us all.’