Page 74 of The Betrothal

“So,” I continued. “I went from placements to further studies until I ended up working on my doctorate. Each year Teddy didn’t move on, and to make matters worse, as the time passed he turned entitled, self-serving. Possessive.” I shuddered at the memory of his hands on my body. “I steadily replaced one hope with another – that I would find a loophole.”

I palmed my face, hearing it out loud made me sound idiotic. “Then my aunt became unwell, and she left me everything. Her final ‘fuck you’ to the system she managed to manoeuvre around, at least a little. And that hope became desperation. I had the education; I had the means to live. I just needed an out.”

“Fuck, Killer.” Seb hadn’t left Alex, hand clamped on his shoulder, his ghosts still tormenting him.

“But my way out never came.” It never came. Two more tears spilled over my lashes, coursing down my cheeks. I didn’t bother to wipe at them. More of those were absolutely coming. “My life at university, my little teaching job, my flat. Gradually each one was removed and my family swept me back home shortly before my birthday. I was staring down the barrel of my thirtieth birthday, and the society wedding of the year.”

All eyes in the room were creased with sympathy. I didn’t want it, but I understood it. They didn’t need to feel sorry for me, no-one did, I didn’t need sympathy.

I breathed deeply and Ben tucked a tissue into my hand. I dabbed at my eyes, fruitlessly trying to put the emotions back in the bottle.

“Thank you, Ben,” I mumbled. He simply squeezed, giving me space to carry on. “When I saw Teddy at my birthday party, or more appropriately Father’s brilliant excuse to turn a social occasion into a political stage. Well, he got me on my own.” The men all bristled, anticipating what would come next. I hurried to calm them. “Nope. Let’s say I left physically unscathed, if a little manhandled.” I scowled at the memory and none of the men relaxed. “And, from that interaction I saw the reality of my future.”

“Izzy, that’s horrendous.” Ben slid closer, his body warm against mine.

The closeness broke something down in me and I dabbed my face, rushing to finish.

“Long story short, I found an alternative. Took what little money I had and ran from what was intended as a women’s weekend away before the nuptials. I’ve left everything. Lost everything. But technical details aside, that is what brought me to you.” My voice broke.

I heaved in a few deep breaths to soothe the discomfort of having laid it all out. “I had no intention of intruding on your lives, I should have made it to the hotel in time and been gone, or as good as. I won’t ask you to lie for me.” I gave Alex a pointed look in reference to our previous conversation. “Well, not really long-term. All I can ask is that you don’t tell anyone that I was here, not until I have left. Even a few hours could make all the difference. And…” I measured my words. “That’s if they’ll still take me.”

The men were staring. Expressions a mix of fury, horror, sympathy, and for Alex, guilt. For me, or at me, I didn’t know.

“They’ll take you?” Seb pushed for more.

“I missed my window when the storm hit. I’m due to call them in a few days to find out my next move, actually. But that’s all you need to know. Honestly? I’m not going to expose you to any more risk, and the fact I have been here at all… well, Alex is right. You’ve been unknowingly exposed to enough. When I broke into your house, I planned to be gone before anyone even realised I was here. I’ve endangered you, and I’m sorry.”

I stood, Ben rising with me and Seb mirroring us from his place by Alex, who very slowly stood too.

“I get that I can’t leave for a while. I was naïve to allow this entanglement.” I teased my hand from Ben. “Seb.” I gulped. “You just made me feel so safe. As though I could have anything I desired, if it was what everyone wanted, if it didn’t hurt anyone. But the truth is, I have hurt you. And I am so, so, sorry.”

I had fled to my room, the tears now flowing freely, tracking down my cheeks, over my jaw and along my throat. The steady stream began to dry, the sensation itching and frustrating.

No-one had followed me which was both a relief and a dagger to the chest. What did I really expect?

While it was a comfort that two of the men weren’t angry with me, there was still no sane reason for our dalliance to continue. I’d gone from a stranded woman to the highest profile missing person in the country. Our entanglement, however brief, would end very badly for them if news got out.

Sick of feeling puffy and tear-stained I eventually snuck away for a shower, ice cold initially, to act as a type of distraction, before I allowed myself the comfort of the warm water.

Emerging, I realised, in my haste to wash the upset away, I’d left my clean clothes in the bedroom. Great, not only a high-profile missing person, but one wandering around their house stark-bollock-naked save for a towel and a grimace. I could always put back on the dirty clothes, but I dismissed that option immediately. I drew the line at day-two knickers, preferring none at all – as Ben and Seb had found out.

I rushed, making it to the privacy of the bedroom quickly, kicking the door to behind me.

“Hey, Izzy.”

“Fuck!” I startled, backing into the door with a thud, it clicked closed.

“You’re jumpy?” Seb lounged on my bed, hand resting under his head.

My eyes caught on the flex of his biceps and I dragged my gaze away to find Ben sat in the window seat.

“I wasn’t expecting you.” I tightened the hold on my towel, eyes darting to the pyjamas sticking out from under Seb’s pillows, then the folded clothes piled beside Ben.

“Weren’t expecting us? How proper.” Seb chuckled.

“In my room. In the room. In this room.” I adjusted. “I didn’t think I’d see you again today. I didn’t think you’d be in here, now.”

Fantastic work, Izzy. Eloquent. Articulate.