Page 69 of In Your Light

Kellan scrambled to Tobin’s side. “Tobin,” he said, touching his face, his hair, but Fray wasn’t letting him go. “What was it? What did you see?”

Tobin shook his head, bewildered. He scrubbed at his face, looking at Hadeom in dismay. “Bleak. So fucking bleak. Vast, endless dark and horror. I can’t.... It wasn’t like this before. Something changed.” He shook his head and pressed his hand to his stomach. “I think I’m gonna be sick.”

“Get him up,” Kellan said, helping Fray pull Tobin to his feet.

They got him out the front door before Fyn heard Tobin vomit.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” Sawyer whispered, his eyes wide.

“What the fuck?” Hendrix murmured, pulling Dylan in close, away from Hadeom.

Fyn understood. He got it.

He couldn’t even begin to imagine the horrors Hadeom had seen, had been through.

Had caused.

He went to Hadeom and sat down. He lifted Hadeom’s head onto his lap, pulled the blanket up, and began stroking his hair. “He told me who he is,” Fyn whispered. “I guessed, and he said yes.”

Fyn didn’t want to cry. But his heart hurt for Hadeom. He wanted to fix him. He couldn’t stop the tears.

“He’s not the same as before,” Fyn said, as if that explained what Tobin had meant about Hadeom’s mind being different now. “I know he did terrible things. It’s what he had to do. It’s who he was, who he was made to be. But it broke him.” He wiped away another tear. “He was staying at the hut, hiding away because he needed a place to heal. He was so sad when he first got there. He was so lost. And I finally got him to smile.”

Fyn wiped away yet another tear. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what he did to Salem. I didn’t know. He said he didn’t know about the godlings. He was so shocked to see them, and then he started to cry, and all he could say was that he was sorry.”

Kellan came back in first, then Fray behind him with Tobin tucked into his side. Tobin was pale, and he couldn’t seem to take his eyes off Hadeom.

“What is he?” Tobin asked. “What I saw...” He shuddered. “Fucking hell. It’s so bad. It wasn’t like that last time I saw into his head. Before it was vast, like a huge warehouse with endless rooms, like time went in both directions. But now.... Now it’s...” He let out a shaky breath and whispered, “So bad. Like before he had it all locked up, and now the gates of hell are open in there.”

“Fyn,” Ciaran said. “Who is he?”

Fyn closed his eyes because there was no going back from this. They wouldn’t let Hadeom stay after this, and that meant Fyn would have to leave too. He didn’t want to go, but he couldn’t leave Hadeom on his own now. Not when he needed him like this.

Fyn looked down at him, at his unseeing eyes, his pallid skin, and oh how it broke his heart. He ran his fingers through Hadeom’s hair. “He’s Hades.”

The room fell silent. Not even the fire made a sound.

Fyn looked up at them all, to see their mouths were open, eyes wide.

Fray broke first. He let out a laugh that didn’t sound entirely sane. “Oh, yeah, what’s the worst that could happen,” he said before pulling Tobin into his arms, holding him protectively tight. “‘What’s the worst that could happen,’ Tobin asks before looking into the mind of Hades and seeing directly into hell.”

“Hades,” Sawyer whispered.

“I’m so sorry,” Fyn said, trying not to cry anymore. “Please tell Salem I’m so very sorry. I didn’t know.” He swallowed hard, his voice breaking as he added, “We won’t stay. We’ll leave. When he’s well enough. If that’s okay?”

“Where will you go?” Sawyer asked.

Fyn wiped his cheeks with the back of his hand. “I don’t know.” It wasn’t like he had anywhere else he could go. Maybe Hadeom knew of somewhere.... “I can’t leave him alone.”

“We’ll figure something out,” Ciaran said. He came over and gave Fyn a gentle pat on the shoulder. “It will be dark soon. I’ll bring you up some supper.”

All Fyn could do was nod. He ignored the tear that rolled down his cheek, keeping his eyes on Hadeom, his fingers still brushing his hair. “Could I ask if someone please grab my rucksack? It’s in my room. Please.”

“Sure thing,” Sawyer said. He came back with the rucksack. “Do you need anything else?”

Fyn tried to smile for him. “No, thank you,” Fyn said, fresh tears welling in his eyes. “You’ve been so kind to me.”

“Oh, Fyn,” Sawyer murmured, ruffling his hair. “You’ll be okay.”