Page 3 of The Mistletoe Mix-up

Sam shot Ricki a text.

WTF? You getting involved in my public roasting?

At least I said something sweet about you!

Sweet my ass, you called me a man-whore.

“Our next caller is Sally’s Life is Sweet.”

“Oh no,” Sam moaned, banging his face against the soft pillowy top of his couch.

“What’s the matter, Uncle Sam?”

Sam looked up at Jace, his head already throbbing. He pointed to the tablet, but before he could tell him to turn it off, Sally started in.

“Sam is a fatphobic, scared little boy who wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him in the ass.”

Sam groaned, thinking about that one time at Brews and Chews when Sally had offered to do just that, and he’d been horrified. Not that he didn’t like a little rough play, but he didn’t mess around with women who’d dated any of his friends. Or if not friends, people who hung around with him and his brother during social gatherings. While he might think Pike Sutton was a bit of a prissy prima donna, he was not going to fuck him over by sleeping with his ex.

And I’m not fatphobic! Big or small, I love them all.

Nope, that rebuttal would definitely get him killed.

Sam picked Jace up off the couch and shook his head. “Next time you’re worried about my well-being, can we not involve the general public and some radio personality quack?”

“She is usually more helpful,” Jace said, obviously disappointed.

“The lines are still lighting up, and I’m sorry to say the consensus seems to be that Sam isn’t relationship material and is destined to die alone, but maybe I’m wrong. Next caller?”

Sam tapped on Jace’s tablet, cutting off whatever new tirade was coming. Sam carried Jace into the bedroom and tucked him back in, giving him a reassuring smile. “Why don’t you listen to something else, alright? I don’t really want you hearing all that stuff about your uncle.”

“It’s alright, Uncle Sam. I hear a lot when Mom and Aunt Holly talk about you.”

Sam groaned. “Uh, I’m afraid to ask what they say.”

“Aunt Holly thinks when you meet the right girl, you will be an amazing husband.”

Sam smiled. There was a reason Holly Winters held a soft spot in his heart.

“Mom doesn’t think it will happen though. She says you’re too set in your ways.”

Sam ruffled his nephew’s hair, ignoring the sting of those words. “I guess I’ll have to prove your mom wrong, then, huh?”

“What do you mean?” Jace asked.

“Well, if your mom doesn’t think I can get a girlfriend and your aunt does, I think we should prove Holly right. That I can be a good boyfriend.”

Jace sat up so fast, their foreheads nearly collided. “Really?”

“Hey, if you think a girlfriend will make me happy, who am I to argue with a smart guy like you?”

Jace nodded solemnly. “It’s true. I get A’s on all my spelling tests.”

“I’ve heard that about you.” Sam hugged him and pushed him back onto the bed. “Now, get some sleep. We’re making a donut run in the morning.”

Sam got up from the bed but didn’t make it to the doorway before Jace called his name. Sam turned, his hand on the frame. “Yeah, pal?”

“Are you going to share your secret stash with your girlfriend?”