Page 3 of Where I Escape

I squeeze Finn’s hand back. “You’ve been working long hours. You don’t need me waking you early with my problems.”

"You could call me ten times a night, and I would always be there. Nothing in my life is more important than you. I want you to be happy, Blair." He means it, too. Finn is the kind of man who would drop everything if a friend was in need. I’m just not someone who would ever take advantage of that.

2

FINN

A nightmare is a big deal, even if Blair doesn’t want to admit it. I’ve gone over to her house in the mornings after she’s had one. She has bags under her eyes. She’s more withdrawn. You can see the dark shadows of the dream dancing in her eyes. I hate seeing her upset. But today she seems good.

Beck strides toward the table with a tray full of food. I release Blair’s hand to sit back while he lays everything on the table. I’ve lost my appetite. I want nothing more than to comfort Blair and take her home. However, I can’t do that. Beck’s excited about us trying out some ideas he has, and maybe it’s not the worst thing for Blair to be out of the house. Besides, if she didn’t want to go, she’d have told me.

We spend the next hour sampling all kinds of food. Pairings I never thought would go together, but when Beck does it, he makes the flavors sing in harmony. It reminds me of the reason I hired him. He's the fucking best.

The drive back to Blair’s house is done in silence. Nothing more of the nightmare was said while we ate, and I didn’t want to bring it up. The last thing I want to do is cause Blair more pain. I have no doubt her thinking about the nightmare will do that.

To say I’m in love with Blair is an understatement. What I feel for her is an all-encompassing, earth-shattering, would die for her kind of love. Of course, I’ve never told her that. I don’t think she sees me as anything other than a friend. Which is just lovely. Apparently, I need more friends. Parker, Cy, Tori, and Eve are enough. I want Blair as more. But how? It's been years, and she's never given any inkling of feelings for me that are more than PG rated.

Every time I see her, every time she’s close, it takes everything in me not to pull her into my arms and find out what her lips taste like. I could never make a move like that on Blair, though. Not after all she’s been through. She has to make the first move. She has to tell me she’s okay.

I know about her past. One night when we were watching a movie together years ago, she told me. She laid it out there while I held her as she cried. I know every part of Blair. Not only her past but the good things as well. Little tidbits of information that have been revealed to me throughout our friendship.

Parker warned me never to hurt her. This was back when he thought we were an item. We weren’t then. We aren’t now.

I pull into her driveway and shut the SUV off. I have zero plans of going back into the city until tonight. I’m going to spend the afternoon here, where she can talk if she wants or say nothing and just have the peace of mind of someone being home with her.

“You’re staying?” she asks before getting out.

“If that’s okay. I can work. I have my laptop.”

She nods. “Company would be nice.”

We get out of the SUV, and I grab my laptop bag from the back seat. Blair unlocks the door and disarms the alarm. Arrow Falls isn’t a big town. It’s the kind of place where everyone knows everyone else. There aren’t many secrets here. Well, except for the ones held behind tightly closed doors. Like the hell Cy dealt with that none of us knew about. Even thinking about what he went through ignites my veins with rage. Then there’s what happened with Blair before she came to live here. Everything that took place in her home, and Parker’s as well, at the hands of her ex is something the entire town knows about. Hell, people across the country heard, thanks to the media. It’s not every day a best-selling author is involved in such a thing. People were killed. Others were shot. It was brutal. Blair is more at peace now. She doesn’t have her unhinged ex gunning for her.

Inside, we walk upstairs to Blair’s office. She settles around the desk, while I pull up a chair in front of her. We both open our computers so the tops of the screens touch and we’re facing one another. This isn’t the first time we’ve worked like this. Actually, we’ve done it countless times. I like to sneak glances at the stunning woman in front of me as she works.

Blair writes under the pen name Brenda Simone. Her books are loved and sell like motherfuckers every time she releases. She loves what she does. Her face lights up when she writes. I've seen her laugh and cry with her characters. She says I must think she's crazy with how she talks to them. But I don't see crazy. I see a woman who is passionate about what she does for a living, and that's amazing.

Her long, dark hair hangs over her shoulders for a moment before she pulls it back and twists it into a messy bun, which is only held up by two pencils she found on her desk. Her brown eyes focus on the laptop screen as her nails click away on the keyboard. I’m so fucking gone for this woman, it’s not even funny.

She looks up and catches me watching her. A blush rises to her cheeks. “What?”

I smile. “You’re stunning.” It’s not the first time I’ve told her how attractive she is, but it is the first time I’ve added a little heat to my words.

She ducks her head. “I’m not.”

“Blair, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” Sure, I could have kept that feeling to myself, but I find I can’t keep my mouth shut at the moment. I want so much more with her. I want a life with her.

“I know how you see me, Finn.”

I cock my head. “You do?" There's no way she knows the extent of my feelings, so I'm curious as to what she has to say.

She sighs and leans back in her chair. Her eyes fully focus on me. “I’m a friend. Just like Eve and Tori are. I’m someone you can hang out with and talk to with no strings attached. I’m your best friend, who’s always there for you no matter what.”

And here’s more honesty from me. “Well, you’re right about some things. You are my best friend. You are always there for me. But you’re more than that, Blair. I don’t see you how I do Tori and Eve. I never have.”

She sucks in a breath. “What do you mean?”

I scrub a hand over my face, trying to decide how much I want to lay out there. This could backfire so fucking fast. “I have feelings for you.” There, I said it. Like ripping a bandage off. Okay, so I didn’t profess my undying love, but it’s something. Maybe enough to push us to the next level, or enough to push us over a cliff, with no chance of salvaging our friendship.