Page 1 of Where I Escape

1

BLAIR

There are a lot of things people see when they look at me. They might see their favorite author. That’s a hat I proudly wear. It’s a job I love and a passion of mine. Others see a friend, a boss, and a fighter.

My life hasn’t been easy. I’ve been beaten, raped, and lost my unborn baby at the hands of the man I thought loved me. Witnessed him shoot the ones I love. And was there to watch his life end. I’ve seen more death than I care to think about. I hope I never see that kind of carnage again.

Panic attacks are still part of my daily life, even though it’s been years since I watched my best friend kill my ex-fiancé. I wish he hadn’t had to do it. I wish Brant had died at the hands of someone else. But Parker was the one to deliver the final blow. He did it so Brant couldn’t hurt anyone again. Parker will always carry that day with him—the one where he killed his own stepbrother.

“I’m getting tired of waiting, B,” Parker whines as he flops down on the plush, lilac chair I have by the window in my home office.

“You can’t rush me. You know this. I can’t force the characters to talk to me. And you being here, giving me shit about it, isn’t helping.”

Parker is a man who will shout to the world how fabulous my romance novels are. He’s one of my biggest supporters and reads every single book I write. Then again, so does his wife, Astoria, and my assistant, Eve. They are all more than that, though. They’re my best friends—my family.

I don’t just have regular friends. You know, the ones you see on occasion. The ones you text every now and then. No, these are my best friends. Five of them, to be exact.

Cy and Eve are married. Parker and Astoria are married as well. And then there’s Finn. Just thinking of him sends a shiver up my spine in the best way, which I try to hide in Parker’s presence.

Parker, Cy, and Finn were friends in high school and stayed friends as they grew up. Eve also went to school with them but wasn’t part of their clique. This is where it gets interesting and very soap opera-esque.

When Cy was trying to figure out his emotions for Eve, Finn asked her out. That didn’t go over well with Cy. He’s about as alpha as they come. Obviously, nothing much happened between Eve and Finn. Anyone who looks at Cy and Eve knows they belong together. They’re as much in love now as they were when they first started dating.

Then there’s Parker and Astoria. Again, when Parker and Tori weren’t getting along so well, Finn met her and asked her on a date, not knowing of the past she had with Parker. Parker is almost as alpha as Cy and wasn’t happy at all. That left Finn with two failed dates and two very pissed off men who were once his friends.

I went to the same high school as them but graduated eight years prior. Parker and I were close when I was dating his brother. Brant didn't like that and was very jealous. That jealousy led to the horrible things he did to our unborn baby and me.

The support of my friends is what got me through the hardest years of my life. Each person played a role in my healing, both mentally and physically.

Fast forward to present day. Finn is still single, and I’m still hiding in my home—not voicing how I feel about him—how I’ve felt about him for some time now. Finn isn’t just another guy, though. He's one of the best men I've ever met. He ranks right up there with Parker and Cy, and that's a pretty high pedestal I have them on. They’ve gone above and beyond for me. They’ve fought for me, protected me, and loved me as only best friends can. The one thing I can’t tell them is: I’m secretly in love with Finn Bradley.

No, the three guys don’t have a strained relationship anymore. They actually get along great and have guy’s nights all the time while Eve, Tori, and I do girl stuff.

I’ve been asked if I have feelings for the super sexy Finn and every time, I say no, though I have a feeling Eve knows. She’s around me a lot. I don’t know how I’d get everything done if it weren’t for her.

Finn comes to visit me often for lunch while Eve is here. She’ll wink and excuse herself to meet her husband. She insists Finn has feelings for me. However, he’s never voiced them, and I've never asked. I'm afraid to know. Afraid of a whole lot of things if I'm honest with myself.

When I think of dating, of letting someone into my life on a permanent basis, fear takes over. The last man I let that close to me violated me in more ways than I want to remember. But with Finn, I feel like I might be able to let him in. If only I were willing to take the leap. And it’s a huge leap. Like the size of the Grand Canyon. But what if I get everything I’ve ever wanted?

“You’re doing that thing again,” Parker observes. He stops scrolling on his phone to look at me.

I wave him off. He doesn't need to know I'm thinking about a certain someone. "Just had a book idea," I lie. It's a believable one.

He narrows his eyes then goes back to his phone. Thick blond hair falls forward over his forehead as he concentrates on what he’s doing. I have no doubt he’s researching something for work. He’s a very skilled software developer. To the point that what he’s created has made him millions when he sold it. He doesn’t need to work, but he loves what he does.

“Why are you here, Parker?” There has to be a reason he dropped by. He doesn’t exactly have a boring home life. What with twin sons about to start kindergarten.

He lies his head back on the chair. “Tora kicked me out for a while. Apparently, I was riling the boys up and making things worse.” Astoria was always Tora to Parker. Not Tori like the rest of us call her. No, that nickname is reserved solely for him.

I laugh. “What did you do?”

“I bought them a laser tag set and told them to play… inside.”

“Why would you do that? It’s gorgeous out today. You have enough land and trees that they could have so much fun outside.”

He levels me with a glare. “Listen, I never said my ideas were great, but she didn’t need to throw me out.”

“I doubt she threw you out. You’re probably being dramatic.” He rolls his eyes.