Page 81 of Knot Only For One Night

He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t try to convince me of anything. Doesn’t offer empty platitudes or threaten to murder whoever made me cry.

Just holds me.

He lifts his arm and I grip him like if I let go I’ll fall into the abyss. And I cry into his forearm instead of my hands, the soft fabric of his sweatshirt dampening with my tears.

I wanted that interview to go so well. I wanted it so bad.

And I just… I don’t even know where I went wrong.

“Let’s go to Juni’s,” he mumbles. He gently pulls away, grabbing my stuff off the ground and kneeling in front of me. His other hand goes to grab my thigh, encouraging me to get on his back. He lifts me up and hoists my legs to wrap around him. I lock my ankles so it's not so much work on him.

You’re never too old for a piggyback ride.

I lay my face on his back as he starts walking. I wonder when he got here, if he was here the whole time. Either way I’m so grateful to be with him.

Once, twice, three times I open my mouth to say something. Anything. I owe him something, I think. But each time, I just close them, looking like a blubbering fish, I’m sure. I sigh, closing my eyes as he walks. Juni’s should only be a few blocks but…

“I can walk,” I mutter against his wide shoulders.

“I know,” is all he says.

I scoff. “You can put me down.”

“Do I have to?”

“I… I guess not,” I say, gripping him tighter, adjusting myself so I can lay my head on his shoulder.

“Good.”

I bet we look odd… no, I know we do, but I find myself caring less and less with each step he takes. Isn’t this what alphas are for? Though I know Soren and Reed would probably do the same.

I laugh a bit, inhaling as much of his caramel scent as I can. Each whiff makes me calmer, sleepier. His pace, the light chirp of birds and rumble of cars, all the crying. A nap is very much needed.

After some cookies.

I could never say no to Juni’s chocolate chip cookies.

CHAPTER 27

NEVEN

I’ve been surrounded by hurt people for a long time. There is something about the pain that people constantly carry that makes me see them that much more.

I see it in Reed, how he limits himself due to his designation. In Asher, and how undeserving he feels because his condition makes him feel like an outsider. Soren and his brothers’ reputation tarnishing his.

Even in myself, I feel it. How lost I feel about the direction of my life. How aimless I was until the group of us found each other.

Today was the first day I truly saw it in Esper. And I fucking hate it.

Carrying her was more for selfish reasons. My alpha needed to feel as if he was helping his omega, and I needed time to figure out how to fix this. Fix those tears streaming down her face. The painful sobs wracking her body.

I needed them to stop. Emotions don’t work that way.

A box of fresh chocolate chip cookies isn’t gonna solve her problems, but it's a start.

It took everything in me not to storm in that damn office and rip whoever the fuck came into my field of vision first to shards.

But this isn’t the Stone Age. More importantly, my omega needed me in a different way. I couldn’t be selfish and try to handle this like a man. I needed to handle it like an alpha. Like a leader.