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Blue lifts his head up at the sound of his name, then immediately drops it back on my lap like we’re bothering him.

I shake my head, exhaling softly. “I don’t even know what we’re doing.”

“Do you like him?”

I stare at my hands, then at the window, avoiding her gaze and reply, “Yeah, I really like him.” Hayzel’s gaze meets mine as she traces over my features, studying me.

“And does he like you?”

“I think so?” I shrug.

“You think so, Reya?”

I tilt my head, looking at her this time. “Well, he doesn’t exactly talk about his feelings,”

She gasps, “Who would have thought? Shocking…” She replies exaggeratedly. I laugh quietly as she nudges my leg with hers. “Did you sleep with him?”

I nearly choke on my saliva.

“What? You knew I’d ask that, Rey,” she adds, shrugging.

I stare at the ceiling, then back at her and sigh, “Yes.”

Her eyes go wide. “You fucked our professor?!” She squeals.

“Yes… Yes, I did okay? Can you please keep your voice down or do you want the whole of St. Ellesta to know?”

She grins. “Okay, okay. But, was it good?”

“I’m done with you,” I reply, smiling, already standing up to go to the bathroom.

“Wait,” she yells behind me and I pause. “Seriously, promise that you’ll be careful? I don’t want a freaking professor of all people breaking my best friend’s heart.”

I turn my face toward her and smile. “I promise, he won't. If anything, he’s healing it.”

With that, I leave to take my shower.

Play - Willing and Able by Noah Kahan

I’m drying my hair as I open the door leading into my bedroom. A thought dawns on me. I completely forgot to talk about Milo’s birthday coming up.

“Oh, I forgot to tell you—” My sentence is cut short as I see Hayzel standing at the side of my bed trembling.

“Hayzel?” I whisper.

She turns around, holding my sketchbook in her shaky hands, tears slowly fall down her cheeks and I freeze.

The drawings, the thoughts, the drugs and blades, even the abuse. She knows.

“Give me that,” I say, my tone meaner than I wanted to.

She doesn’t move at first, her eyes are still on me, confused, shocked maybe. “Mireya, wh—” Her voice sounds strangled and the tears stream down her face.

“I–It’s just thoughts and drawings, Hayzel, that’s all. Don’t do that…” I try to sound convincing, but my best friend knows me better than anyone else. She knows I’m lying.

She knows.

She wipes her face after handing me the sketchbook. “I thought I knew you.”