Page 78 of The Rules of Dating

“Are you kidding?” He flashed a mischievous grin. “I’ll be disappointed if I don’t have to come back to fix it again.”

***

That night, I asked Billie to come have dinner with Saylor and me. Billie suggested buying stuff to make our own pizzas because she thought Saylor would have fun with that. And she insisted on picking up all the ingredients after her shop closed for the day.

She texted me from the grocery store.

Billie: What kind of toppings does Saylor like?

Colby: She likes pineapple, actually. You can just buy the canned kind. And bacon. That combo.

Billie: Interesting combination for an interesting girl. Okay. What do you like?

Colby: What do I like? That’s a loaded question.

Billie: LOL. No need to hold back.

Colby: Quickies in the laundry room with you after Saylor goes to sleep. My cock in your mouth. My dick buried deep inside you anywhere, anytime I have the chance. My cum on your tits. The list is endless.

Billie: You have a one-track mind.

Colby: You know it. I’m addicted. To answer your original question, I’ll eat anything—but I do have a favorite thing to eat. Can you guess what that might be?

She responded with a photo of a can of pineapple up against her chest. Her corset today was a burnt orange color I didn’t remember ever seeing before. As usual, I was paying more attention to what was inside of it though.

Billie: This can okay?

I couldn’t help messing with her, because who’s looking at the damn pineapple can when it’s up against her heaving chest?

Colby: Can or cans? Those cans are fucking perfect. God, hurry up and come home so I can nuzzle your neck when Saylor isn’t looking. (That brand is fine.)

My use of the word home wasn’t lost on me. We were far from living together, but I still felt like her place was with me, that somehow my home was hers now, even if she didn’t sleep here. Have I mentioned that this woman makes me deliriously happy?

Billie: Not done yet! Still have to find the sausage. And don’t you DARE make a sausage innuendo.

Colby: Why you rainin’ on my parade?

Billie: Get it over with then.

I laughed as I typed.

Colby: I’ve got a sausage for ya. ;-)

Billie: Feel better now?

Colby: Much.

Billie: Okay, in all seriousness: sausage and pepperoni for us. Pineapple and bacon for my girl. Gonna get some fresh basil to sprinkle on top, too. I’m excited!

Colby: I’m excited, too.

Billie: Why do I think you’re not talking about the pizza?

Colby: I am most definitely not talking about the pizza. Get your ass back here, beautiful.

After Billie arrived at my apartment, she got to work straight away, pulling things out of bags and laying all the pizza ingredients on the counter. Saylor sat atop one of the stools and watched as Billie got everything ready.

Unfortunately, I didn’t have a rolling pin, so Billie improvised with a wine bottle to spread out the dough.