Page 160 of Matteo

I've always been careful with my heart, protected it because I've seen what happens when lies and deceit poison something good.

Now my heart is fractured, and the worst thing? Elizabeth did this.

Mama looks up at me, her gaze steady. “You see, Matteo, it wasn’t that he had done a small wrong, like he had forgotten my birthday, or the anniversary of when we first met. Those are small things that can be explained away. This secret was too big, and there was proof.”

“Proof?”

“He showed me a picture of her, and of their children. When I saw that they were around the same age as you boys, I hated him even more. It was proof that he'd chosen deception every single day. Not once, not twice, but every day for years. I’ve never understood how he could lead a double life so easily.”

Proof.

Alex has proof.

Systems don't lie. Digital signatures don't lie.

Elizabeth poisoned what we had. She kept secrets. She let me get close while hiding parts of herself that mattered. The trust between us is fractured.

Gone.

I start to understand a fraction of what Mama must have felt all those years ago.

Then guilt follows immediately.

It's not the same.

Mama built a life with the old man. She gave him years. She gave him children.

Elizabeth and I...

What we had barely had a chance to begin.

In a few months, maybe a year, I'll forget her.

The thought hits like a punch to the gut.

No.

I won't.

I shift in my chair, suddenly restless.

Because the truth is, I've never met anyone like her.

She’s brilliant, infuriating, stubborn, vulnerable, and stronger than she realizes.

I don't know how it happened, or when, but I started entertaining dangerous thoughts.

Foolish thoughts.

Thoughts that maybe she was the one person worth taking a chance on.

“What are you thinking, figlio mio?”

I clench down on my teeth again, sit taller in the chair, scramble for something else. Not Elizabeth.

“Aurora ... you still talk about her as if you know her, Mama.”

“I feel like we lived our lives in parallel. She was married to him, had a family, and lived in ignorant bliss.” She shrugs, before saying softly, “At least, I believe she did, I don't know. I'll never know if she ever suspected anything. And here I was, with him, not married. Your grandparents weren't happy. They didn't like that he didn't marry me. I used to think he would, some day, when he'd established his business. I had no idea how well he was doing back then. I never thought to spy on him, or ask too many questions. I was in love, and blind, you see.”