Page 78 of Bonds of Shame, Bonds of Lust

When her mouth closed over my clit, I made a sound I hadn't made before. I should have said something. I'd lost the ability to speak somewhere in the last hour. Her mouth had been on me for two full seconds before my brain caught up, and by then it was too late. Janice didn't pause. She'd been waiting for that sound.

"Should I stop?" she mumbled.

She hadn't stopped. Her tongue was still resting against my clit. The question was being asked with her mouth still on me. I didn't say the word I was supposed to say. Her tongue moved, slow, exploratory. My silence was her answer. Janice put her mouth back on me.

This was Janice. My Janice.

The thought looped, dizzying. My best friend had her mouth on me. The wrongness wasn't separate from the pleasure. It drove my pleasure.

Janice would never take advantage of me. Janice loves me. This is Janice. My hips kept lifting toward her mouth.

I reached down with both hands and squeezed my breasts. Hard. Then I pinched my nipples and tugged. The sharp sting went straight to the place Janice's mouth was, and the place Janice's mouth was answered.

Janice noticed. She lifted her head just enough to see what I was doing, and her eyes went somewhere I hadn't seen them go before.

"Mmmm. Lacey."

That was all. Just my name.

I slid my hands lower, reaching for her hair, trying to pull her tighter against me.

She caught my wrist and pressed it back down to the bed. Held it there. The hold wasn't a suggestion.

The fresh wave of desire that moved through me didn't have anything to do with her mouth.

She lifted her head again. Her finger was still inside me, slow and steady, not letting me settle.

"Stay still," she ordered.

She crawled up my body. Slow. Kissed and licked along my stomach, my ribs, the underside of my breasts. Her finger never stopped thrusting in me.

She reached my nipple, licked it once, flat and slow. Then sucked it into her mouth. The pull was strong. Her thumb found my clit at the same moment and rubbed hard, fast circles. All at once. The sensations didn't blend. They sharpened against each other.

Then they stopped being sensations I could count.

Time went strange. Janice's tongue. Janice's finger. Janice's thumb. They weren't separate things anymore. They were what my body couldn't get away from and craved. I lost the where. I lost the want. I lost my own breath.

I was making involuntary sounds. They came from my core.

I'd read about this. I'd thought the descriptions were exaggerated. They weren't exaggerated. They were polite.

I like to own women, she'd told me.

I bucked against her hand. Janice's mouth found my nipple and bit it. Not hard enough to break skin. Hard enough to make me make another visceral sound.

The pain went where every other pain had been going for the last hour. It fed my new circuit. The one I had only recently uncovered.

I was right there. Right at the edge.

She stopped her thumb. "Not yet."

Calm. Easy. The voice of a woman who'd decided when I was going to come and was going to enforce her decision.

A broken sound came out of me. I raised my hips, chased. Janice's hand on my wrist tightened. Her other hand, with her finger inside me, moved slowly, just enough to keep me from coming.

I'd never been held at the edge. Brad hadn't edged me. Ricardo hadn't edged me. My own hand in the dark had never edged me. The not-letting-me-come was its own sensation, and it belonged to Janice. I like to own them.

The shame arrived fresh. I begged without speaking. I bucked against my best friend, who held me here on purpose.