Page 49 of Carnal Risk

“That’s a little harsh. It’s not like I have sex with all of them. That’s not who I am.”

“But you don’t ever see a girl for more than a week. Don’t lie.”

“It is what it is. You know the position I’m in. Can I get beautiful women? Yeah, sure. But they aren’t like Selby. She’s different.” Garrett turned to his friend, and set his palms on the granite countertop. “I keep telling you that I don’t know what’s going to happen. It’s not all about me or what I want. As you just pointed out, at the end of her contract, or even before if we replace Evan, she might not want me. She could decide that this is all too much for her at any point. She could cut things off.”

“I’m not trying to be a hardass. It’s just that Selby and I, we’ve been friends a long time. It’s not like she hasn’t dated over the years but it’s never been serious. I think because she’s kind of reserved. She keeps things inside and is super controlled but that’s why she’s good at what she does. She’s hyperfocused.”

Garrett paused, listening to his friend talk about Selby in a reverent manner. He’d known something had gone down between them but he suspected that Lars’ feelings ran deeper than he’d admitted.

“Hold up a sec. I’ve gotta ask you. You’re grilling me over here about how I’ll treat Selby, and I get that you’ve known her for a long time, but do you have a thing for her? Because if you do, Lars, I don’t know…I love you, you know that. And I know we’ve shared women before, but Selby…I don’t know if I could do that.”

“Look, I am not gonna sit here and tell you I feel nothing. But at the same time, whatever we have, it’s not love, love. If that’s what you’re asking. So if you’re in love…”

“Holy shit, bro. No throwin’ around the ‘L’ word, okay? I think we’ve gotta reserve that for another day and time because I just can’t go there. But if you’re telling me you’re in love with her…” Garrett blew out a breath. The eggs started smoking and he turned his attention back to cooking. Jesus fucking Christ. As if he didn’t have enough problems.

“I didn’t say that I was in love with her, but I do love her. Why the hell do you think I’m so pissed off at you? She’s not just some employee. She’s my friend.” Lars stood and went to the microwave to warm his lukewarm coffee. He set his cup inside and pecked at the buttons. “I’m just sayin’ that I care about her. Do I find her attractive? Who wouldn’t? But that ship has sailed for Selby and me. I think we’re better off as friends.”

“Are you a dick in the box?”

“No. I mean, if she’d do friends with benefits, I may have considered it. But she’s not like that. Which is exactly my point. You know everyone in Altura’s pretty open about sex. Selby isn’t.”

“Maybe you don’t know her as well as you think you do,” Garrett countered. He’d seen how Selby had come alive under his touch on the balcony. She’d thought someone might catch them and had loved every second.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Lars retrieved his mug and took a sip.

“I’m saying that maybe she isn’t as introverted as you think. Last night at the club…she may not be as open as the rest of the crew, but she’s not a prude either.” Garrett reached for a plate and worked while he spoke. “I just think she’s scared. But scared isn’t the same as not having courage. Oh no. My girl got out there and surfed the other day. And it wasn’t just that. She wiped out and hit it hard. And when she got out? She wanted to go again. You know what that tells me? It tells me she’s brave.”

“I didn’t say she wasn’t. I’m just saying that she’s my friend and I don’t want you fucking with her head. But my guess is that it’s already too late for that.” Lars sniffed the air. “Do I smell brownies?”

“Yeah.” Garrett laughed.

“What the hell?”

“I thought she might want something sweet.”

“Who the hell eats brownies for breakfast? You suck at cooking.”

“It’s brunch. And yeah, I’m making my girl something to eat anyway. And your lazy ass too. So how ‘bout you help me?”

“Nice. Okay, what can I do?”

“Wash the strawberries. Grapes too.”

“On it.” Lars went to the refrigerator. “Laura’s going to kill you for messing up her kitchen.”

“Yeah, I know.” Garrett gave a small laugh. “She’ll forgive me.”

“So have you heard from Dean yet?” Lars turned on the spigot and began to work.

“He texted me. They’re still at her apartment. I don’t want her going over there until the place is completely cleaned up.”

“Have you talked to her about it yet?”

“I told her I’m taking care of it.”

“Okay.”

“I’m not going to put her through anything else. I think whatever happened over at her place is related to Evan’s death. I don’t know the who, the how or the why, but I just know this has to do with Evan. And it pisses me the fuck off.”