Page 23 of Carnal Risk

“I’m just preparing for my lesson is all,” she teased. “If you’d been my teacher, you could have helped me.”

Shit. Garrett couldn’t wait to play with her to see how far she’d take things. She might be afraid of heights, but she sure as hell knew how to push some boundaries. She’d only met Seth once and yet she was toying with them both.

“Here you go, almost in. Turn around,” Seth guided.

She followed the direction, and Garrett tensed as he caught sight of the long scar that ran from the top of her left buttock up to her shoulder blade. He was no stranger to the occasional laceration, and was certain that whatever had caused it must have been serious. His curiosity piqued, he was unable to recall anything in her file about an injury. Her disclosure about her anxiety had come as no surprise, but he wondered if she’d been in a car accident or something far worse. As the scar disappeared under the latex and she turned around, her eyes locked on his. He knew he’d been caught staring when her smile fell flat.

He forced a small grin and waved but she’d quickly focused her attention back on Seth, who’d begun giving her instructions. His gut teemed with guilt as his business call connected, and he considered that he shouldn’t have been so hard on her. The next lesson would bring pure pleasure, he swore. As he heard his name called from the speaker, his eyes fell to his computer screen.

Chapter Ten

Selby’s stomach clenched when she caught him staring at her scar. He tried to play it off with his cool smile, but she knew he’d witnessed the mark on her soul that reminded her every day of the person she’d fought not to be, a victim, torn apart by a predator. While she’d grown independent and free spirited, the vulnerability of her childhood remained. Despite Garrett’s carefree attitude toward it, she knew all too well that action was never taken without consequence. Her innocence stolen on a warm summer day, she blamed herself for the attack.

A fresh rush of shame rose to the surface and she swallowed it, repeating the silent mantra that a child couldn’t be responsible for the actions of a monster. She hadn’t invited the pain, asked for the strangling emotions that stalked her throughout the years. In her moments of strength, she’d concealed her weakness, pretended it didn’t exist.

Not even Lars knew what had caused her first attack. Confessing her anxiety to Garrett had been somewhat liberating. While most clients knew the details of her health history, no one had ever broached the subject with her. When she’d told Garrett in the car why she sang, she’d experienced a sense of relief. Grades and money were of little consequence as she stood bare at the microphone. Under the spotlight, she became someone else; a sensual being who entertained, without feeling remorse or responsibility. It was an escape from reality.

Her attraction to Garrett and his charismatic demeanor continued to blur her judgment. After he’d cut off her nylons the previous night, she’d gone home, wishing he’d fucked her. Touching herself had provided little relief from the constant ache that plagued her. When he’d given her the bathing suit, continuing his promise of adventure, she’d tried to deny the excitement. She’d accepted his challenge, getting dressed in her office.

On the way to the car, she’d taken so many deep breaths she teetered on the edge of hyperventilating. But as they began to converse, she relaxed. A speck of the person she wanted to be shone through her hardened exterior. Flirting came naturally as he pressed her with questions. Given the right circumstances, she feared she’d follow him anywhere. Worse, when he’d asked for her consent, her first instinct had been to say yes, to give him whatever he wanted. She’d resisted, caving only after losing to her own internal struggle.

When she’d learned Seth was her instructor, her heart had dropped. Garrett was the one who’d promised her adventure, a lesson. He was the teacher she’d hoped would be at her side. When Seth had taken her hand, she stepped into the role of tease. As if she were on stage, she’d enjoyed Garrett’s eyes on her as she donned her wetsuit…until he’d seen the scar.

Seth’s voice broke her contemplation and her nerves rose to the surface.

“Lookin’ good. You ready?” he asked her.

Nodding, she forced a smile. Her eyes darted to Garrett. Underneath the dark glasses, he appeared engrossed in his call.

“Nice job in the meeting today, by the way.” He grabbed a couple of surfboards and started toward the water.

“Thanks,” she replied nervously. Like a puppy, she followed him. What the hell am I doing? Sure she’d been an avid swimmer in the health club pool, but go for a swim in the ocean? Certainly not. In the Pacific? Not on the warmest day during an El Niño. Add sharks and giant alien stalks of kelp to her list of fears, and just hell no.

“Sorry they were hard on you. With Evan’s accident, things have been out of sorts. Everyone’s on edge. There’s no replacing him, but the show must go on.” He settled long planks flat onto the sand. “Garrett and Evan, they were pretty close.”

“Were you close with him, too?”

“We were amicable.” He winked. “But he and Garrett, they’d been together a long time. Lars told me…”

“Lars told you what? Wait, how do you know Lars?” A look of confusion crossed her face.

“We’re friends. Got in some jumps together…stuff like that. Sometimes we get together for parties. I guess Garrett has mentioned our, uh, outings.” He stepped on a board and knelt.

“No. I mean, I don’t know him very well. I actually just started yesterday.”

“You must be pretty special for him to let you come into Emerson like that. Take over for Evan.” He waved her over and pointed to the board.

Without being told what to do, she stood atop the surfboard.

“That’s it. Come on down here. Promise I won’t bite.”

“I’m not special per se, but I do have certain talents. As for letting me take over for Evan, it’s only temporary. I did this as a favor to Lars.” Selby found she was growing more comfortable, as if she’d finally found someone she could talk to. She considered asking him more about Evan, but he continued his train of thought.

“Clearances. Yeah, I get that’s important. But lots of people have them.”

“I’m good with IT. Computers.”

“Hacking?” He laughed.