Page 106 of Life, Love and the Pursuit of Happiness

Nana? And Poppa? Oh, my! I foresee a disaster in the future. “Where’s Gram?”

“She’s outside with the neighbor lady, eating horse doors and drinking singing-poor-things.”

It took Delilah a moment to realize that she meant hors d’oeuvres and Singapore Slings. “I miss you, pumpkin.”

“Me, too. Gotta go. It’s my turn to play Marco Polo in the pool.”

The line went dead, and Delilah just stared at it for a moment. Guess that puts me in order of my daughter’s priorities. But, actually, Delilah was glad Maggie was okay with this temporary separation.

When she came out of the shower a short time later, there was a missed text from Merrill:

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Delilah tried to call him back, but she got an “out of range” message. He’d probably turned off his phone just so she couldn’t give him a piece of her mind. Then she puzzled over the letters MM. Oh, he meant the Marilyn Monroe halter dress. But why? She would have thought the press conference was informal.

She did as he asked, even though she would probably look like a fool, especially if Charlie was there in coveralls. But Bonita would be dolled up for the cameras, no doubt about that. Not that Delilah was going within a mile of any camera, not if she could help it.

When she got to the Conti mansion, driving the old station wagon, it was early. Only one o’clock, but there were already a dozen vehicles and a number of news vans. She saw Gus and Adam, who were both dressed casually, darn it! They came to help her carry her supermarket purchases inside while she went over to the Stella’s panel truck, which had just pulled up.

The pocket doors that separated the two huge drawing rooms on one side of the mansion had been opened to create one extra-large space. A dais was set up at the front with long tables and chairs and microphones, and several dozen folding chairs were arranged in rows down below. Having lived in Bell Cove for several months now, she was not surprised to see a pirate theme going on, or was it some convoluted shipwreck scene? No, it was pirates, she decided, on seeing that the enormous stuffed gorilla, a prize from a wildlife safari of one of Gabe’s ancestors, had been rolled into the room. On its head was a red bandanna tied at its nape biker style, or was that pirate style? There was a patch over its one eye. A kid’s swashbuckling-type sword was taped to its one hand.

The decorations were heavy on skulls and crossbones. Some barrels had “Grog” written on their sides. A number of canvas kite-type things hung from the ceiling that Delilah assumed were supposed to be ship’s sails. And, yes, some of the townsfolk were dressed like crazy-ass pirates. An enormous pirate’s chest was filled to overflowing with shiny gold coins, with two pirate guards with rifles standing on either side of it, the twin senior citizens, Mike and Ike. When she walked up to them, they addressed her with, “Ahoy, matey!”

What was really nice, though, was the enormous banner hung behind the dais depicting a sepia-tone sketch of the Falcon. The work of Bonita and Adam, she was sure. There were press kits sitting on a number of the chairs, also the work of Bonita and Adam, who had been busy beavers, apparently.

Delilah moved to the long, glassed-in sunroom off to the side, which had probably been screened-in porches at one time. There were several folding tables there with white tablecloths on them. That’s where she directed Adam and Gus and the caterers to put her purchases.

She hadn’t had time thus far to feel like a sore thumb in her dressy clothes, compared to the others. But then, she noticed Kevin, who was in a dark jacket over a dress shirt and tie, and jeans and athletic shoes, but still he was clothed more like her dressiness than the rest. Bonita wore a black spandex dress that hugged her curves and would have fit in anywhere. She guessed it was that kind of affair where everything goes in terms of attire.

She set everything up, and a couple of townspeople asked if they could man the table. In fact, they set up several other tables with skulls and crossbones and leftover Fourth of July paper products. They carried in a number of large ice chests, which they just slid beneath the tables for now. Holy cow! There would be enough food and drink here for an army—or a dozen bands of pirates.

It was a sign of how anxious she was that she could joke with herself like that.

When she peeked out into the main room, Delilah realized that the whole town must have shown up. Aside from the press in the first few rows, who were being bossed around by Laura Atler, the local newsperson, every seat was taken, and folks were lined up against the walls. Many of them gave her little waves, which surprised her. By now, everyone should have heard about her felony status. Instead of judging her, not having heard actual details—even Merrill hadn’t heard those yet—they seemed to not only be accepting, but supporting her. Was that possible?

Gabe Conti, owner of Bell Forge and Merrill’s business partner, owned this big mansion. He sighed on first viewing all the pirate nonsense going on, especially when he saw what they’d done with his gorilla. But then, he’d shrugged and laughed.

Ethan Rutledge came in with his wife, Wendy; his mother, Eliza; and daughter Cassie, who walked with a limp but was supposedly going to have an operation soon. There were a number of potted palm trees around the room, thanks to his landscape nursery, no doubt. Must be this was supposed to be a pirate’s island hideaway or something.

The mayor and her troop of helpers, responsible for this unusual press conference, a pressarama, were all in pirate gear. Even her daughter, Francine, the hairstylist; and her husband, the sheriff, Bill Ferguson. Bill came up to her and whispered, “Don’t you be worryin’ about that goon guy. He’s been extradited. Not only is he gonna pay for attempted assault here, but he has warrants a mile long back in Jersey. He’ll be seeing a lot of time.”

“Thank you so much.”

He shrugged, as if it was nothing. “As for that other thing, I saw that Ms. Gardner and her cohorts snooping around here earlier . . .”

Here? Delilah glanced quickly around the room. That’s all I need. I knew I should have stayed away and lain low. Too late now. At least Maggie is safe.

“. . . but you’re not to worry,” the sheriff went on, patting her on the arm. “No one’s gonna revoke your parole, not while I’m on duty.”

OMG! Are we gonna have a shoot-out at the pirate mansion?