Page 84 of A Cruel Kindness

The Bond went off like a firecracker, blasting into my head with a satisfied string of sounds that would make it sound like an excited child if anyone else could hear.

Soren’s thumb started to make passes over my shoulder, and it sounded like a contented hum was building in his chest.

I caught the eye of a young soldier across the aisle, who was looking at us with stars in his eyes.

Don’t, I felt compelled to warn him. Don’t offer yourself up to the goddess in hopes of finding this. I felt immeasurably lucky to have been Matched with Soren, but that meant I lived in fear every day that he’d be taken from me.

That fear would never leave, not until either the worst came to fruition or this war was over. I wasn’t sure that would occur in our lifetimes. Depending on what the Muli prince’s offer was, that is.

For now, I simply burrowed into Soren’s warmth, momentarily satisfying the Bond. I was sure the second we arrived in Florus, it would be far different from this quiet comfort.

I let myself relish in it, holding onto him the way I wanted. His hand brushed down my back in quiet strokes that made me feel so safe I felt tears threatening to pool in the corners of my eyes.

Fear started to creep in, now that I accepted how important he was to me. I understood the madness of the Bond. We couldn’t last more than a few hours in different cars.

I didn’t want to think of a world where that distance was longer, more permanent.

I made myself focus on what I could control, what was right in front of me.

That was Soren, holding me to him like I was his lifeline, while his heart beat a steady drum in my ear.

That was good. I could focus on that.

The Bond hummed along peacefully, halfway towards content. My cheeks heated when I realized that I knew what would fully satiate it, and whispered an internal promise that it would come soon.

It would.

Chapter 20

Soren

I was man enough to admit when I was nervous.

Nerves were the only way to describe what I was feeling, after three hours of torture, sitting in a car feeling like the other half of my soul was ripped away from me.

It literally had been.

Even now, with Bellamy curled up against me, I couldn’t shake the stress.

Let alone the fact that we were walking into this to serve as messengers of peace negotiations … I hadn’t seen my family in six years.

My relationship with my parents was always tense. My mother shared the sentiment of most Royals, trying her hardest to maneuver a way to stay in power. She’d recognized early that I was quite popular among the Royals.

Even as a teenager, I’d been well-received. People swore they could see a leader in me, but I’d always felt like that wouldn’t be my path.

I’d known something was coming.

That thought was confirmed when I found out my name had been drawn in the draft, conveniently the same year that discussions about my leadership started popping up. Claiming it made far more sense for me to lead, rather than passing the mantle to House Edelstenne.

Even now, with an Edelstenne tucked safely under my arm, I still remembered how it felt to find out what happened. The draft was rigged, of course it was.

Bellamy’s father had known exactly what to do, who to target, to get my name drawn. The draft was public, in the name of accountability. Ensuring the public that the Royals were just as susceptible to the draft as they were.

When my name was announced on the news, there was no going back.

I’d had my Mark drawn out that very same night, the pain hardly able to penetrate the numbness of realizing what my future held.

My anger at Bellamy’s father was well-placed. He clearly had no qualms fucking everyone over for his own gain. Whatever selfish reason he had for ignoring the peace negotiations from Muli, it didn’t matter.