Page 78 of A Cruel Kindness

From the moment dinner ended until the point where me, Soren, Esme, and Ford walked up to the Bridge to relieve the last guard, I didn’t get a moment’s peace.

Even back at the cabin, a short stop to grab some things to help us overnight, I’d somehow ended up helping Esme pack while Soren and Ford were off doing only God knew what.

As the last unit walked off, I stood by feeling slightly out of place. They clearly had a system. Esme took out the satchel that we’d filled with food and drinks. Ford grumbled over the state of the fire.

Soren walked around the small area in front of the cave containing the Bridge, pushing aside some bushes as if someone was crouching in wait. I guess we couldn’t rule out that possibility.

I busied myself with setting up the blankets we’d brought over the wooden benches surrounding the fire. Ford’s tweaking had already exploded the idle flicker into a roaring flame.

The moon was bright in the night sky, surrounded by even brighter stars. I realized that they looked a little farther away than they did back on Vir. I’d always loved to sneak out and sit on the roof of the castle in Florus, staring at the constellations dotting the sky.

“Here,” Soren said, handing me one of his sweaters. I looked down to realize goosebumps had erupted over my arms. I hadn’t even realized I was cold until he did.

I smiled in thanks, slipping the sweater on. My head went a little faint when his scent trickled into my nose.

In case I did actually faint, I sat down on one of the benches. Soren was quick to follow, plopping down next to me and immediately throwing his arm over the back of the bench behind me. He spread his legs wide, flexing his hips up as he got comfortable.

I had to stare at the fire to hide my blush.

Ford was sitting near the fire with his arms slung around his knees, and Esme was pulling her legs up to sit cross legged on the bench.

I had to smile at the way she looked. She was in a rugged, oversized canvas jacket, lined with fleece, but was still covered in gold jewelry. She was my friend, so I’d always think she looked beautiful, but there was something particularly captivating about her tonight.

Too bad Ford was staring at the fire, I thought to myself. Maybe it would finally awaken the Bond.

Right as Esme reached into the pocket of her jacket to pull out a bottle of whiskey, Freya’s voice called from across the field, “Don’t you dare drink that without me!”

Esme flipped her off, taking a sip straight from the bottle.

Freya’s bright laugh boomed across the space. She was so vibrant, I didn’t even realize Arthur was trailing her until they approached.

When the fire illuminated her figure, my eyes fell right to her chest. I didn’t know why it had never occurred to me that I’d yet to see her Mark.

She had a star right in the center of her chest, with rays of light beaming from it that trailed from the base of her throat, as far to the slopes of her shoulders. There was something under it, that trailed beneath the line of her shirt, but that star was obvious.

Freya walked over, her hair looking as vivid as the flames crackling before us, as she reached over Esme’s shoulders and picked up the bottle, taking a healthy swig.

She was halfway to another when she paused, meeting my eyes over the fire. She raised the bottle towards me, toasting. “To Bellamy. Welcome. We’re happy its you.”

Their group was close. Until she said it, I didn’t realize how much lingering doubt I had that I was a poor replacement for Carson.

Soren’s hand came to rest in between my shoulder blades as my eyes started to mist. “Well, if you’re going to make me cry with a toast, you may as well let me have the next sip,” I said, my throat slightly hoarse with emotion.

Freya smiled, walking around the fire and placing the bottle in my hand. I took a deep swig, relishing in the feeling of the amber liquid sliding down my throat.

Of having … well, of having friends. For the first time.

It seemed so silly, to have lived twenty four years of life without that. I’d been afforded countless other luxuries, but I couldn’t name them right now.

I passed the bottle over to Soren, turning to watch as he took a swig and his strong throat worked to swallow.

As pleasant as this was … I really wished we’d had a second alone.

“Alright, Arthur,” Freya said, motioning for Soren to pass the bottle to him. “Drink up.”

Arthur’s movements were slow, his smile small. He took the bottle from Soren, quickly drinking before passing it to Ford. I’m sure he felt out of place here, among two paranimas and a woman who could bounce between worlds at her whim.

Still, Freya thought to include him.