Page 44 of A Cruel Kindness

My eyebrows pulled together. “What?”

“I only care about how strong one person thinks I am.”

“Who? Your mommy?” The jab fell from my tongue lightly, without thought. That only seemed to happen with him.

“You.”

A blush warmed my cheeks immediately. Not necessarily from the sentiment, but from the way his voice had dropped low and rough. “Well,” I said, when I regained my composure. “I must admit that I walked right into that one.”

Soren didn’t laugh, though I’d expected him to. Instead, he walked toward me, and it only took one stride of his long legs to reach me. There was a moment where I almost ran away, panic rose into my throat so quickly.

Something kept me rooted to the spot, allowing Soren to walk right up to me, our bodies so close together I felt static spark between our skin. He paused for a second, looking at my face with careful observation.

After a moment, I felt something brush my cheek. It felt like the soft caress of the back of his fingers, but I didn’t dare look down. I watched as the corner of his lip jumped up as his skin coasted over mine, surely amused by how heated my cheeks had become.

“How loud is it?” Soren said, his voice so low and rough it took me a second to realize that he was speaking.

The Bond answered with an indiscriminately pleased scream in my head, banging against the confines of my mind in unbridled joy— just because Soren was touching me.

The warmth in my cheeks went nowhere as I responded, “Loud.”

For a moment, Soren’s eyes went soft, his expression bordering on pity before he regained control of himself. No matter how badly I wanted to, I would not be returning his question. I didn’t think I had enough self control to resist his answer.

The softness cleared almost as quickly as it had formed, his easy, if not cocky, disposition returning. “We had a deal,” he reminded me. Maybe even reminded himself.

“I know. I can handle it.” It felt like a lie, but I said it anyway. I wasn’t known for my self-sacrificial qualities, but I couldn’t ignore what I’d discovered. Couldn’t sit there and watch plans that would destroy lives and planets continue moving forward.

Soren hesitated, his eyes tracing over every inch of my face. After a moment, it seemed like he forced himself to move past me, though our arms brushed as he did so.

That innocent brush of skin sent heat lashing through my body so quickly, my body moved on its own accord. My hand shot out, latching on to his wrist as he took a step away from me, finding it without sight.

His pulse picked up, slamming against my fingers where they pressed into his wrist, right next to the strong tendon that ran up his forearm. I didn’t want to think too hard about the fact that my fingers barely touched around his wrist.

“Bell,” Soren all but growled, warning clear in his tone.

“Sorry,” I said quickly, ripping my hand from his arm. The Bond was none too pleased with me, yelling a rather creative string of expletives in my head for not giving it what it wanted.

Please, I begged internally. The Bond was a simple creature, only caring about what it wanted right now. Unfortunately, life wasn’t that simple.

I made myself take a step away from Soren, and watched him run his hands down his face in frustration. He rolled his shoulders back, stretching out his neck as if that was necessary to reset himself.

“Alright, I’m going to leave,” he said decidedly. Poor phrasing, as the Bond started screaming again. Soren blinked once, as if he could hear the screeching himself. “I need to talk to Peter about our assignments.”

“Okay,” I responded through a hoarse voice. “Just—”

“I’ll fill you in,” Soren said, finishing my thought. “But I think we need some space.”

We really did. The walls felt like they were closing in on me, only making me aware of Soren’s presence and the bed behind us.

Goddess help me, tonight was going to be brutal.

“Go,” I said, my voice weaker than I cared to acknowledge.

Soren’s feet stayed rooted to the spot for several seconds, though his body seemed like it was trying to move toward the door. I watched, trying to restrain the urge to beg him not to go, as he curled his fists and forced himself to leave.

I didn’t move, didn’t even breathe, until I heard his boots on the stairs outside.

When I was sure he was gone, my chest collapsed in on itself, my breaths entering my lungs in pained pants.