Page 131 of The Gods Forbid

Or else I was scared I’d do something I’d regret.

Chapter 30

Persy

I wasn’t quite sure what time Sebastian got back, mostly because I’d locked myself in my side of the studio well into the middle of the night.

Only when I was certain he’d be back did I inch out and try to manage a few hours of sleep. Nearly impossible, given how twisted up I felt.

My mind needed to figure out whether or not it wanted to avoid Sebastian, because when I extracted myself from my room around mid-morning, I felt disappointed to find that Sebastian wasn’t home.

He’d left me coffee though. My stomach felt so horrible, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to get anything down, but I sat down at the counter and sipped the sweet, creamy coffee and lost myself in my thoughts.

When I heard the side door open, my shoulder blades pinched together.

I turned to find Sebastian standing in the doorway, arms crossed over his chest, and absolutely covered in paint.

“What happened to you?” I gasped out, my coffee forgotten on the counter as I stood.

Sebastian laughed, flipping his hands to look at the paint splattered all over them. “Got a little messy with this one.” He grinned in a way that made my stomach pull tight. “It’s a good one though.”

“What does that mean?” I asked, speaking more to his muscled forearms than to him.

“All my best paintings made me look like the paint exploded on me in the aftermath. I think after Sunlight Incarnate, there was paint in my hair for weeks. Who knows, this one might beat it,” he finished, his lips curling into a smile.

All the blood drained out of my face and right to the floor. A horrible, horrible idea popped into my head.

I couldn’t do it. It would be so, so wrong.

But I was honestly quite sure I was going insane. Enough that I’d convinced myself it was possible Sebastian had painted me. It would give me a small bit of peace if he had, finally giving me some sign this was more than a passing attraction that I wouldn’t survive.

If I looked at his recent paintings, even just this one, maybe I’d…

No, no, I couldn’t.

But he had technically walked into my side of the studio without asking.

“What happened last night?” Sebastian asked, pulling me out of my spiral.

“I’m sorry,” I said, feeling the need to apologize for what I’d said to his aunt. “I didn’t mean to speak to your aunt like that.”

Sebastian stepped towards me, and he looked distinctly like a predator. “That isn’t what I was talking about.”

My brows creased together. “What, then?”

“You defended me,” Sebastian said, taking another step closer to me. Almost like he didn’t intend to.

I held my hands out in front of me. “I told you already that you deserve to be defended. Don’t make me tell Calpurnia.”

Sebastian’s mouth quirked at the mention of his doctor. Mine, too. One who had started our session a week ago by asking, “So, any romantic developments you want to tell me about?”

“You wouldn’t dare,” Sebastian said. One more step. Even closer. “I was in the process of shutting my aunt down when you approached.”

I frowned, my lips turning down. “I didn’t assume that you would be enjoying that conversation.”

I felt Sebastian’s hands curl around my own, gripping them tightly. I swallowed thickly, unable to do much else. “I need you to know that I wasn’t encouraging her. This is over. You don’t have to worry about me fucking up and coming back here for another stint.”

Sebastian said it with such force, the words hit me in the chest like stones. Of course, he wouldn’t come back here. He didn’t want to.