Page 36 of Crown: Phase 4

“But you don’t do it anymore, right?”

“I had a slip-up after Mo died.” Danger kept it real.

Caresha’s heart sank. She knew Lil Mo’s death had damaged him, but she hadn’t known it had pushed him toward something capable of destroying him.

“But I’m good now. I don’t touch that shit no more.” He quickly added.

Caresha continued to stare at him, and Danger could see the concern settling across her face. It made him feel exposed in a way he hated. He wasn’t afraid she would judge him for who he had been. Nah. He was afraid she would decide fucking around with him came with too much risk. He feared that she would change her mind and walk the fuck away from him.

Danger was well aware of the woman sitting near him. Caresha didn’t play any games. She was about her business and very self-aware. He knew because that was one of the many things that attracted him to her. The way she carried herself was what set her apart from the rest.

“Com’ere,” He said, setting his fork on the plate.

Still shaken by what he had revealed, Caresha slowly stood and moved between his knees before settling sideways across his lap. Danger wrapped one arm around her waist and looked directly into her eyes.

“I’m done with that shit, Ree. Forever. I know what it almost cost me the first time, and I know what that slip-up could’ve turned into. I’m not going back. I promise you.”

Caresha searched his face for any sign that he was lying. She had learned that love…lust…doesn’t always blind a person. Sometimes, it simply convinced them to ignore their own judgment. The red flags would still be there. Their intuition would keep speaking, but hope would keep negotiating until they no longer trusted themselves enough to listen. That was what terrified her most about love: not only choosing the wrong man but losing faith in her own ability to recognize one.

Yet she detected no deceit in Danger’s eyes. All she saw was a man who had made mistakes, carried the shame of them, and was trying to do better. He was flawed, but her intuition believed he was good. Her intuition had never failed her, so she leaned down and kissed the top of his head, letting her lips rest there for a moment.

“Okay.” She replied, her stiletto-shaped nails slowly moving through his locs.

“Why you so quiet now?” Danger asked after a while, noticing he was almost done eating, and she hadn’t said another word. “You gon’ stop fuckin’ with me?”

Caresha snickered. “No. Just don’t break your promise to me, and we good.”

“Never.”

Caresha swallowed hard as Danger took the last bite of his food, trying to build herself up to reveal the secret she had been keeping. His honesty had removed every excuse she had for not telling him right now. It wouldn’t be okay to hold on to it another day.

“Tell me yours.” Danger said.

“Well…”

“Well…what? You started this shit. Don’t get quiet now.”

Caresha did the opposite, growing silent. Her teeth caught the corner of her lip as she tried to decide where to begin.

“What is it, ma?” Danger asked, planting a few kisses along her chin, then cheek.

She inhaled deeply and looked away.

“Come on. What is it?” he pressed. “Can’t be no worse than mine.”

“I…I think it’s pretty bad.”

“Well, I know from that cat you ain't used to be a nigga.”

Not expecting that, Caresha’s forehead fell against his, and she laughed. Hard. And he did, too…until he didn’t anymore. Danger grew serious, softly gripping her chin with his hand.

“You ain’t secretly married or got another nigga you feelin’, right?” A nigga like him had seen and heard it all, so his mind naturally went straight to the worst-case scenario.

“No. Of course not. You the only nigga I’m feelin’, Dee.” Caresha spoke from the heart.

“Good, ‘cause I wanna be that nigga who marry you when the time right.”

She blushed, staring into his eyes. Life with him in it now was like a dream.