Page 39 of The Highlander Is All That

“Lord Twiggenberry has something he’d like to ask,” her aunt said gleefully. For some reason, she could barely keep still in her seat. “Go on, my lord.”

Twiggenberry bent over Elizabeth’s hand. A waft of his pomade assaulted her nostrils. “You know I hold you in great esteem, my lady.”

Her stomach surged. Her pulse pounded. Her palms began to sweat. She thought, for a moment, she might faint. “I . . . ah . . . Thank you, my lord.”

He sent her an ardent smile. “Do call me Twiggy.”

Twiggy?

“I . . . ah . . . Yes, my lord.”

“We both come from the best possible stock, you know.”

Ah, yes. Like cattle.

“And my family has great regard for your cousin, the duke.” His smile dimmed, just a tad. “Even though he is, you know, a Scot. He is still a very wealthy man. That does erase many a social sin, you know.”

Did it?

“At any rate, my dearest Elizabeth. I am humbly pleased to offer you a position by my side for as long as we both shall live.”

She gaped at him. “I’m sorry?”

“Oh, don’t be. I know this is a shock. The season has barely begun, but I took one look at you and knew you were the woman I wanted to bear my heirs.”

Oh dear lord. Her stomach surged. “Did you?”

“You have fabulous hips.”

Really?

She glanced at her aunt, who was beaming. “This is famous. Absolutely famous. The season has hardly even begun and here we are. One down.”

Elizabeth didn’t know what to say. Her head spun and a buzzing howled in her ears. She could hear Twiggenberry continuing to speak, but none of the words made sense.

But one thing was clear. He wanted to marry her.

Marry. Her.

He wanted her to bear his children.

She had fabulous hips.

Something rose within her. Something bilious.

She couldn’t stop it.

She couldn’t keep it down.

She opened her mouth to respond, to scream “No! No! No!”

But that was not what came out.

What came out was nuncheon.

In fact, she evacuated all over Lord Twiggenberry’s elaborately embroidered vest and his perfectly polished shoes.

And then, mercifully, she swooned.