Page 129 of Spurred On

He flinched. “You said I never looked your way. Never noticed you.”

“I did.”

“That’s not true.”

Her mouth fell open and she gaped at him.

“You’re beautiful, Porsche. But I always kept away because of Ford. He’s my friend.”

“I know that.”

“He made it clear I was to keep my distance. It doesn’t mean I was never attracted to you. I, ah, just wanted you to know that.”

“Well, thank you. I appreciate that.” She picked up her suitcase, but he took it from her and set it on the floor. He wasn’t done yet.

“I’ve always wondered . . .”

“What?”

“What it would be like to kiss you.”

She sniffed. “I imagine it would be much like kissing all the other girls you kiss.”

He flinched again. “I’m not a philanderer. Not like Ford says. I’m just trying to find the real thing, just like everybody else. And now . . . I really need to know if I blew my one chance at happiness.”

“Cody, don’t be silly—”

He ignored her. He stepped closer and pulled her into his arms. She didn’t fight it. When his lips touched hers, she remained quiescent, letting him explore. It was a nice kiss. Nice and sweet but . . . Yeah.

As with every other woman he’d held, every other kiss he’d tasted . . . it left him unsatisfied and bereft. Because she wasn’t Sidney.

It was the confirmation he needed, and he could see from Porsche’s expression, their kiss had validated something for her as well.

He sighed and leaned his forehead against hers. “Anything?” he asked.

She gave a slight shake of her head. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m the one who should be sorry.” He stepped away and moved toward the door.

She stopped him with a gentle hand on his arm. “I do hope you find what you’re looking for, Cody,” she said softly. “And I do love you . . . just not in that way.”

He nodded in response; his throat had closed in. “I . . . understand,” he finally croaked. “And, thanks.” He did understand. More than she could ever imagine.

He loved her too.

Just not in that way.

And it was clear to him now, he would only ever love one woman in that way.

And she was gone.

***

The next day, Sidney called and spoke to Claire and gave her notice, citing the need to spend more time with her father.

It was bullshit and Cody knew it.

He tried calling her—she didn’t pick up. He went over to her house—her father insisted she didn’t want to see him. He sent flowers—she let them die and burned them in the front yard for him to find the next time he came by. The letters he sent her were returned to him in a large manila envelope, ripped to shreds.