Page 27 of The Highlander’s Tempting Touch

“Och... I dinnae even…” Niamh blinked, her cheeks feeling hotter than the fire only a few feet away.

“Ye’re wonderin’ that I can be so forward in speakin’ o’ such things? Or if me husband would be angered tae find I was speakin’ o’ things that most hold tae be private?” Catriona smiled. “A healer has tae be able tae speak candidly o’ many things. At least, ‘tis me way o’ thinkin, and me husband kent that when he chose tae wed me.”

“I always heard that... that a woman’s modesty and silence on personal matters was her greatest asset, after her virtue.” Niamh winced as she heard the words echo in the air. “I’m sorry... I didnae mean tae be so rude, or so forward…”

To her relief, Catriona only laughed. “Aye, the menfolk dae say that. But ‘tis the same menfolk who turn tae a willing lass when they need release, often as nae. And men who talk the loudest o’ things they claim women should keep quiet in regard tae. Besides that, as a healer, I’ve other expectations placed upon me that are far more important. How could I treat those that might need help if I didnae understand the problems?”

She shook her head. “If yer healer had sense enough tae put her patients above propriety, ye’d nae be so nervous now, I wager.”

“I… I hadnae thought o’ it like that.” Niamh bit her lip. She wasn’t sure a better explanation on the ways of womanhood would have helped her fears, but it would have made her younger years far less confusing. However, on the eve of her wedding night, she had far more important things to talk to Catriona about than the failings of her clan’s healer. “I heard stories from the serving women – they say the first time hurts.”

“And it does, a bit. There’s nae escapin’ it. When the man takes yer maidenhead, there’s a bit o’ pain, for the same reason there’s blood on the sheets after a first night. But... and this is the important part fer a lass tae remember...if yer man is worth bein’ with, he’ll do his best tae make the pleasure outweigh the pain severalfold.”

Niamh considered the words. “I... how will I ken if me husband…”

Catriona’s eyes sparkled, a twist of laughter appearing on her full lips. “This much I can tell ye – the laird is nae stranger tae the ways o’ pleasure in the bedroom. And I’ve never heard rumor o’ him bein’ unsatisfactory in that regard, nor inconsiderate.”

Niamh flushed. “But surely, nae woman would dare speak so o’ the laird.”

“Och, nae tae his face, for sure. But women and men both will tell a healer what they’ll nae say tae any other, and women will gossip among themselves about their lovers, just as men like tae boast tae each other. And even if they didnae wish tae speak o’ the laird and risk his wrath, I’d ken if he were one tae leave marks or bruises on his partners.” The implication that he was a gentle lover was a welcome one. “Nor does he suffer a man who’d force a woman against her will.” Catriona’s expression turned grim but pleased. “The last guard who dared corner a serving lass tae have his way with her when she didnae want his attentions took her knee tae his manhood, then a proper thrashing from the laird in front o’ the rest o’ the clan’s warriors, afore he was sent tae the border wars and told tae nae bother coming back.”

Niamh nodded. “’Tis good tae ken.” She took a deep breath. “I... I dinnae ken aught about bein’ with a man. I dinnae even ken what I should ask.” She looked at the cup in her hands. “I dinnae ken how tae be a proper wife tae Laird MacDuff at all.”

And she did want to be a proper wife. As much as she didn’t want to be wed, and as much as she feared the dangers of childbirth, she was his betrothed. She wasn’t going to disgrace her family or Alistair, or herself, by being a poor wife – the issue of bearing an heir aside.

“Well, there’s traditions in the Highlands that ye might not have in the Lowlands. We do things a bit different here. But we’ll all aid ye with that.” Catriona smiled again. “As tae being a proper wife…” her subtle emphasis on the word left Niamh no illusions what she meant. “...the truth is that it falls on yer husband tae be a proper husband more than it does on ye tae, at least the first night. He’s the one with the experience. Just between me and ye, Laird MacDuff is many things, but he’s nae a fool.”

“What if I dae something wrong? If I cannae please him?”

Catriona shook her head. “Proper lovemaking, like a good marriage, isnae one-sided. She patted Niamh’s hand again. Her eyes were glittering with mirth, and Niamh felt something inside her relax. “If yer husband is doing his part properly, ye’ll be enjoyin’ yerself too much tae pay attention tae aught else.” Catriona smiled. “And remember, men will tell a woman more than they think with their bodies. And dinnae be afraid tae touch him in turn.”

Niamh was sure her cheeks were the color and heat of the coals in the fireplace. “I couldnae... I wouldnae ken where tae begin.”

Catriona laughed softly, kindly. “Nae woman does, the first time they’re with a man! But ye can learn. Every man is different, but it one thing they’re all the same – their body doesnae lie about their desires.”

That sounded like something Niamh could do.

She chewed her lip as she thought over the questions. “I’ve heard women talk about... size?”

“’Tis never as large as the men think it is.” Catriona chuckled, and Niamh found herself laughing a bit too. “Nor so large as the women fear, in general.” Catriona shrugged her shoulders. “And if it is, a good lover will make it as easy as possible, and I think the issue isnae insurmountable.”

Alistair wasn’t a careless man. More to the point, he’d been so careful with her in other respects, she couldn’t imagine that he’d be otherwise in a matter such as this.

That left one topic she’d hesitated to discuss – the most important one in her mind. “What about... becoming with child? I ken they’ll expect me tae bear me husband an heir…” The words died.

“Och, dinnae fret yer head about that.” Catriona reached across the narrow space between their chairs to embrace her. “Ye’re young and healthy enough, I wouldnae expect ye tae have any trouble.”

“But... how will I ken? And... is there a way... tae ensure…”

Is there a way tae ensure I dinnae quicken with child? I wouldnae be so afraid o’ marriage, or any o’ this, if I kent that. But I cannae ask her for herbs that might prevent conception, for she’d ken the truth and, like as nae, tell Alistair. And who kens what might happen tae me faither and my kinfolk then?

“Let yer moon cycles guide ye. If ye’ve a regular flow, then ‘twill be best tae try fer a bairn soon after yer bleedin’ ends. And if yer cycle is late, or ye miss one or two, then ye come tae me.”

Just after her flow ended – she would have to find a reason not to be bedded by her husband during that time. A headache or some other ailment perhaps. It might not be the best plan, or the easiest to follow through with, but it was better than any idea she’d had before.

For now, though, she couldn’t continue to think of her wedding night, or what was expected of her in that regard. She’d never sleep if she kept thinking about it, and she’d be lucky if she didn’t have nightmares as it was.

She changed the subject. “Ye spoke o’ traditions o’ the Highlands... are there any I should ken afore the wedding ceremony?”