Page 57 of Confessions of a Highland Assassin

He grabbed her wrist and yanked her up just as she was reaching for his side. “Ye willnae be touching me again, ye little witch,” he snarled angrily at her, his lips curling into a grimace.

“Boyd… ye’re hurting me…” she cried as he tightened his grip around her wrist.

“I dinnae care! Ye are the same woman from the woods, and the same woman I kissed that night outside the tavern! I see it all now. Ye’ve been in the shadows all this time, but by the Gods, I see it now! Ye-ye lied tae me…”

“Boyd, please! I can explain, just let go of me! Ye are hurting me arm,” she raised her voice as she frantically grabbed at his hand where red marks were beginning to form on her wrists.

He suddenly let her go, flinging her back with her arm. “Who sent ye? Was it Callum? Are ye a spy for the other side? The council warned about ye. But I was too stubborn and pig headed tae listen,” he paced back forth, angrily glaring at her while he waited for an answer.

“It’s true,” she said more gently, tears were streaming down her face. “I am the same woman from the forest, the tavern, and Lady Sinclair. But it’s nae what ye think. I dinnae work for Callum, Boyd,” Ava tried to explain as calmly as she could. “I have an explanation, I swear.” She wished she would have told him to moment he awoke like she was planning. She wanted to come clean, to tell him everything. Together in the love they share, they could find a solution.

“Are ye even a laird’s daughter? Is yer damn name even Ava? How come ye were in the forest then?” he spat angrily as he walked past her again.

“I am nae a laird’s daughter. But my name is Ava… Just nae Si-Sinclair.” She was ashamed and cried softly, knowing how angry he was.

He angrily dragged his free hand through his hair as his other hand clutched at his side. “How am I supposed tae believe anything that ye say? When every other word ye’ve uttered tae me has been a lie?!” His heart was breaking in front of her eyes.

Ava shut her eyes as tears fell down her cheeks. “Boyd, I may nae be who I said I was. But the feelings we have for each other are real… There’s been nae deceit with any of that.”

He stared at her as tears were streaming down her cheeks, pleading him to listen. Yet, he couldn’t.

“All of the moments we’ve shared, every kiss and every touch. That night in my room and even earlier in the study. All of that is real,” Ava shook her head as even more tears spilled over her cheeks. She was whispering as though she was afraid to confess her truth out loud. He may be damned, but he would never trust a woman again. “If ye can just hold ontae those moments and listen tae what I have tae say, it will all make sense. I swear…”

The honest look on her eyes made him want to believe her. But he didn’t know what was real and wasn’t. She’d been an expert in deceiving him up until now. How could he tell when she was telling the truth?

“I-I fell in love with ye, Boyd,” Ava continued and took a few hesitant steps toward him. “I fell for ye even though I ken I shouldn’t. From that first time in the forest when we kissed, ye awoke something inside of me that I never even kent was there. Ye were my first kiss with a man. And I havenae been able to get ye out of my mind since then,” Ava explained breathlessly as the words spilled from her lips in torrents.

Boyd shut his eyes against the physical pain in his side and the emotional ache he felt growing in his chest. He was her first kiss. And she was his first kiss after Cora, the kiss that had awoken the parts of him that he had thought were gone forever. But all of that was a lie. The woman who had restored his faith in love was a damn liar.

Ava reached up and stroked his cheek as hot tears spilled from her eyes. Boyd jerked away feeling burnt at each place the skin of her fingers caressed. “Boyd,” she whispered his name. “I beg ye tae listen tae what I have tae say, I-I’m so sorry tae keep all those secrets, I…”

She stroked his cheek again. This time he rubbed his skin against the warmth of her hand before clenching his jaw and pulling away from her yet again. “How dae I ken that ye arenae still playing a part, Ava?” he spat angrily as he began pacing again. “I dinnae ken how I’m supposed tae trust anything ye are saying!”

“Because I told ye that it is, Boyd!” she raised her voice to match his. “Ye have tae ken that the feelings between us are real! Think on all the times we’ve spent together and let that be what makes ye believe in me again.”

He spun around and glared at her. “Ye dare raise yer voice tae me when I’m the one ye’ve been lying tae? What reason dae ye have tae be angry with me? I am who I’ve always said I was. I’ve nae even lied tae ye once!”

“Just because it’s my fault, disnae mean it hurts me less!” she yelled back at him. “I have just as much at stake in this situation as ye dae! If ye would only listen tae what I have tae say, Boyd, there’s a part of me that kens ye have enough compassion in yer body tae understand why I had tae lie!”

Boyd swore with a word that she couldn’t quite hear and marched over to the table of food as far away from her as he could. “I swore I would never love another woman again! And by the Gods I should have kept that oath,” he spat bitterly as he leaned against the table for support. “Loving a woman brings naething but trouble tae a man! I should have ye thrown in the dungeons!”

Ava took a deep breath and stepped toward him. “Ye can dae whatever ye want with me, Boyd,” she paused and lowered her shoulder in defeat. “I have done many things wrong and ken I do nae deserve yer trust or even yer pity… ye can throw me in the dungeons if ye wish. But ken I was truthful in my affection tae ye.”

Boyd swore in Gaelic as he shook his head and braced himself against the table. There was a part of him that wanted to believe that she had a good reason for lying. She was right that the moments that had shared had felt real at the time. The only times he’d found her strange or odd was when they were around other people.

There was something genuine about the moments they’d shared alone. She’d seemed more real. But he couldn’t fight back the pain and betrayal he was feeling from her lies.

“Boyd, just please come back tae yer bed and rest. Yer wound will open again if ye move too much,” she pleaded with him.

He shook his head at the care and compassion she was once again displaying toward him. The anger and confusion he felt was clouding his judgement and messing with his thoughts as the wound in his side ached with pain.

Reaching for the full mug of ale, he tossed back his head and drained the contents with a giant swig, his Adam’s apple moving with each gulp.

Ava gasped and brought her hands to her mouth as she stared at him in abject horror. She ran next to him just as the empty mug fell off his hand.

It was too late.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE