Page 71 of Fire in his Highland Heart

“Not any longer. I’ve heard an’ seen what I needeed tae hear an’ see. We’re leavin’. I’ve had enough dramatics for a good long time.”

James reluctantly packed his things too. He felt very odd about the whole situation—in the little time he’d known Arguen, he did not think her to be capable of such malice. People could be surprising, of course, but she had been nothing but good to him and to Blake, as well as to all the people at Ernmore. Why, she’d even stayed to nurse Mirellain back to health during her bout of scarlet fever. Surely someone who was willing to nurse a sick child, not her own, back to health would not think of betraying the one she loved.

He thought about voicing these thoughts to Blake, but knew in this moment that they would not be received well or with the manner he intended. It just didn’t quite add up to him. But it was no matter. Blake had clearly made up his mind. All James could do was follow him down to the stables and ready the horses for another long journey.

* * *

Arguen felt as light and free as she did in the days before Malcolm had married. It was a wonderful change, not feeling like she had to hide or stick to the shadows. The prospect of a possible marriage proposal from Blake was also on her mind. She’d never been the kind of girl to dream about a future wedding or husband, like so many other young girls did growing up. She’d always been more dedicated to her work, and people likened her to one of the fairy folk when she was a child. At first, she did not care, but when she grew older, all gangly and thin and snaggle-toothed, she began to believe it herself. She’d rather play in the dirt with her brother than with fine dolls like some of the wealthier young women.

But now, she found herself in such a state of girlish euphoria such as she had never experienced. She, lady of a castle? Her mother would have been impressed, surely. And she knew Blake would not ask her to quit her work as a healer. It would be unorthodox, of course, to have the lady of the castle also act as the healer, but she knew Blake would not do anything to make her unhappy. He’d said it himself.

She wondered where he was now. She wanted to share her happiness with him and tell him that she had officially been declared innocent. But...she could not find him anywhere in the castle. He was not in the study, the great hall, kitchens, stables, or courtyard outside. Arguen refused to check the dungeons, simply because the place gave her bad memories, but was it possible he visited Cataline? She would look elsewhere before she braved that pit again.

Finally, she knocked on the door to the chamber where he was staying. Hearing no answer or no noise, she decided to poke her head in. There was no sign of life, anywhere. The fire had gone out recently, but even his bags were absent. Where could he have possibly gone?

Perhaps he had gone on a walk outside the castle. She never knew him to be the type of person to walk and contemplate, as he was always so busy, but she understood if he would do it now. It could not have been easy to confront his former wife in such a state. As she walked through the meadows some distance from the castle, she heard someone call her name in the distance. When she turned around, she saw one of the sentries running toward her.

“Miss! Arguen, Miss Arguen,” he said, a bit out of breath from running across the meadow to get to her. “Please forgive me, but I heard ye were lookin’ for Laird Mawr,” he said between breaths.

“Aye, ‘tis right. Ye ken his whereabouts?” she asked, hoping she didn’t seem too earnest. Only Douglas and James knew about their romantic attachment, after all.

“Aye, he left Bruckstone not half an hour ago. He an’ his man, James, I think? It looked like they were headed back tae Ernmore.”

If the sentry had grown another head, sprouted fangs, and spit venom, she could not have been more surprised. Blake had left? Without even telling her? But why?

The news was so shocking to her that she stumbled back and landed in the tall grass on her rear.

“Miss, are ye well? Can I help ye in some way?” the sentry asked, obviously concerned at her reaction.

Her head was spinning, and she began to feel more nauseated than normal. It was all she could do not to vomit on the poor man’s shoes. “I... I need tae speak wi’ my brother. Can ye tell Douglas tae come here?” she asked, her own voice suddenly very weary.

The sentry nodded and did as told, right away. As she sat there, dizzy, in the tall grass, her mind ran amok with terrible thoughts. What had she done wrong? Why would Blake leave so suddenly and not even tell her? Did he suddenly not love her anymore? Had she offended him in some way? She held a hand to her stomach as if to comfort herself. Now she wondered what her fate would be. She had not had a cycle in a month, which indicated every unmarried woman’s worst fear. Mrs. Kinney had been right. A mother’s eyes really did see differently.

After several minutes in which Arguen’s mind ran wild, she saw Douglas walking across the meadow towards her. She was too lightheaded to stand, and immediately, her brother could see that something was wrong.

“Arguen, what’s amiss?” he asked, plopping down in the tall grass next to her.

Her brilliant eyes welled up with tears as she spoke. “He left.”

Douglas looked confused for a moment. “Who? What d’ye mean?”

“Blake! He left. Not long ago, an’ he didnae even tell me, or bid me goodbye!” she cried, her voice breaking.

This news hit Douglas like a slap across the face. James had traveled all the way to Bruckstone some weeks ago to ask for his blessing before Blake officially asked Arguen’s hand in marriage, and now he left without a word? Arguen was clearly very upset, so he thought it best not to reveal the tidbit about James asking him to come to Ernmore for a blessing and a wedding. Such information would surely break her now.

“Ye dinnae ken why he left?” Douglas asked.

Arguen shook her head. “Nay. I had just finished my testimony with Mr. Murray an’ it went well, so I looked for Blake tae tell him the news. I wanted tae share my happiness wi’ him, but one of the guards told me he left just a half hour ago,” she explained miserably.

“Perhaps...he had urgent business at Ernmore?” Douglas suggested, trying anything to soothe his sister. She did not deserve to be in such distress after everything that had happened to her.

She shook her head in disbelief. “I d-dinnae see how that c-could’ve happened,” she cried, stumbling over her words. “He came all this way tae help me. Douglas, I love him. Truly, I do. I k-ken he’s the only man for m-me. I-I dinnae ken what tae do now,” she said, and burst into a real fit of tears.

“Och, lass. I’m truly sorry. Ye dinnae deserve this,” Douglas crooned, wrapping an arm around her shoulders supportively.

“‘Tisn’t even the worst b-bit, Douglas,” she managed between gasping cries. “I…” her hand flew to her stomach reflexively, “I’m with child. His child. Without him, I dinnae ken what tae do. I m-mean, there are herbs an’ th-things that can help, but…” she sniffled, “I thought he was goin’ tae ask me to marry him. We could’ve h-had a family,” she cried.

Such news filled Douglas with unbridled fury--not at Arguen, but at Blake. The situation was not her fault. Blake had wronged her and thereby him. If he lost his friendship over the situation, so be it.