Page 61 of No Fear

Balancing the phone between her shoulder and ear, Charlie paid for her salad and walked out into the sunshine.

“I was nervous as hell, but it did feel great telling Donnie I wanted him. And I didn’t actually get laid,” she admitted.

“But you had multiple orgasms. And I bet if he had more time, he would have done a whole lot more.”

Yeah. She’d felt Donnie’s hard cock pressed against her back and that had been the biggest turn on ever. To know she made him that way.

“He tried to stop me. Told me it wasn't the right time.”

“That tells me that he cares. Probably why he didn’t go all the way. Most men who have a woman in front of them asking for sex would not have hesitated. Makes me forgive him a little more for hurting you before.”

Charlie turned back onto University Avenue toward the embassy. “I still don’t trust him, but it doesn't matter. I told him it was a one-time thing, and he’s back in Coronado now.”

“But he’s calling you later?”

“Yes. I’m not sure what to say to him. I don't want any awkwardness. I still want to be friends.”

“Yeah, right. You want much more than friends. Come on, Charlie. If he was open to a relationship, are you telling me you would turn him down?”

She stopped outside the embassy, sitting down on a bench.

“Charlie? You still there?”

“Yes. I’m here. I don't know what I want. How can I trust him when he just left like he did after Nate? I know he regrets it, but it still happened. It still hurts. But he makes me feel... alive. Special. Wanted.”

“And he rocked your fucking world in bed, right?”

Charlie blushed just thinking about all the ways he’d rocked her world. "Yes. I’ve never experienced anything like it.”

“Want my advice?”

“Always.”

“Stop thinking so hard and take one day at a time. Talk to him tonight and see where it goes. I have a feeling Donnie is going to want more with you, but there’s no rush. You did just break up with Simon, and maybe you should take a little time by yourself. It doesn't mean you and Donnie can't talk. Get to know each other again. If it’s meant to be, it will be. Just promise me you won't push him away.”

Tears welled in Charlie’s eyes. The last thing she wanted to do was push Donnie away, but what if she already had? What if he didn’t want anything else? What if he did, but she couldn't give it because she didn't trust him? Forgiving him and being friends was one thing. Forgiving him and being in a relationship was something different.

“Your mind is already running away, isn’t it?” Maddie interrupted her tirade of thoughts.

“Yes. I really like him, Maddie.”

“I know you do,” Maddie said softly. “You always have. Even when you thought you hated him. Deep down you’ve always had feelings for him.”

“What if I’ve ruined it?”

“He left you a note. You've texted and he’s calling you later. He could have walked away like he did before if he didn't want to talk to you again. You haven't ruined it.”

Charlie stood up. “I have to get back to work.”

“OK. I’m here. Call me later, let me know how it goes?”

“I will. Love you.”

Charlie walked back to her desk and opened up her salad. The chopped lettuce looked particularly uninviting. What she wouldn't give for a burger. Comfort food. Her phone buzzed.

Donnie: What’s for lunch?

She smiled, taking a picture of her salad and sending it to him.