Page 119 of No Fear

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“Don’t know. Let's find out, shall we?”

“Charlie, that’s personal. I don’t need to hear.”

She smiled. “Like I’m not going to tell you it all anyway. This just saves me some time.”

She entered her password and hit play, putting it on speaker.

“Charlie. I’m sorry. I know words are easy, but babe, I really am sorry. I never meant for you to find out about Simon that way. Truth can be hard, but as I’ve learned, withholding it can be harder. I should have told you sooner. No excuses. There is more I need to tell you. I don't want any secrets between us, even if I think they may hurt you. I believe we’re strong enough to get through anything.

Charlie, you mean everything to me, and I am not going to let you walk away from me. I’m not losing you again. I intend to do whatever it takes, wait however long it takes, until you finally say you’re mine. I don’t want anyone else. My sight is coming back. I had a great meeting with Dr. Swanson and Sophie today. The only downside was that you were not there to hear the good news with me.

I am back at work in a limited capacity. It’s the only reason I am not there in Albany banging on your door. I know you’re probably leaving for an assignment soon, and I hate that we haven’t spoken. This isn't over, Charlie. I won't let it be.

OK. Pretty sure I’ve filled up your voicemail. I’m here, babe. Waiting. Whenever you’re ready. I’m sorry and I miss you.”

Charlie put down her soggy tissue. That had to be the most beautiful thing she had ever heard. Maddie’s eyes were wet, too.

“Wow,” Maddie said quietly. “You have to call him now.”

He had sounded genuinely sorry. Was she overreacting?

“You haven't told me what you think about all this. You let me talk and cry but have been quiet with your opinions.”

“I think maybe I butted in too much already, sending Donnie to Toronto and starting all this.”

“No! I might have been angry at the time, but I was glad Donnie was there. I don't want to think about what Simon might have done if he hadn't been there. I’m also glad we reconnected. This thing with Simon, what’s happened, is not your fault. I hate that I found out like I did, but I needed to know. I could have married that man. You were only looking out for me as you always have.” She stood and hugged her friend.

“I just want you to be happy, Charlie. You deserve to be happy.”

“I know. Now tell me what you think. I want to hear your thoughts.”

Maddie sighed and sat down. “He loves you. You can hear it in his voice. You love him. I think you still want him. You’re scared and angry, and I completely understand both. But I think you need to consider all of this from his point of view.”

“Which is?”

“He was looking out for you. His way of doing it was by trying to protect you. I’m not saying he shouldn't have told you the moment he knew anything about Simon, but I can also understand why he didn’t.”

“I’m a grown up, Maddie. I’m not the bullied schoolgirl needing his protection anymore. I can handle the truth.”

“I know you can, and I don't think Donnie sees you as a bullied schoolgirl either. Far from it. But when you love someone, care for them as much as Donnie does about you, you don't want to see them hurt. This isn’t like before. He didn't abandon you. He hasn't run away. He wants to talk and work through this, and I think deep down you do, too.”

Charlie swiped a stray tear from her cheek. “I do love him, but how can I ever trust him if he isn't honest with me?”

“He’s never lied to you. Think about it. He left, he hurt you, he withheld information, but he’s never actually lied to you.”

She sighed. He hadn't lied. When she asked him about the pictures and emails, he’d told her the truth.

“I’m not sure I can be with someone who isn't open with me. Who won't share everything, including the really bad stuff.”

“Then tell him that. Give him a chance. He’s a man. He’s not perfect, He didn’t handle this well, but hell, he got blown up. Lost his sight. He kind of had a lot going on. If things had been different, he may well have told you it all before you slept together.”

Charlie looked away. He had said they needed to talk before she had insisted whatever it was could wait because she had wanted him. She got up and put her plate in the sink. She turned, hugging her friend again. “Thank you. I needed to hear that. I’ll call him. I don’t know what I’ll do yet, but I will talk to him.” She glanced at the clock. “Right now, I am going to get out of your way as Dave and the kids are due back and I need to pack or I’m going to miss my flight.”

“Will you call me after, let me know how it went?”

“Yes. I promise. I love you, Maddie. You’re the best friend a girl could have.”

***