Page 31 of Dirty Cops Next Door

12

Toni

“Toni,why don’t you get some rest, sweetheart?” David pulled me from Grant’s bedside and guided me to a chair that didn’t look comfortable yet hospitals insisted on providing.

“Why don’t they ever put proper couches in these places?” I heard myself grouse as I got in the chair and pulled the footrest up.

“Sanitation, perhaps? A lot of bad things happen in hospitals, maybe these are easier to keep sterilized.” He found a blanket and put it over me.

The total lack of smell on the thin cotton always unnerved me. Hospital bedding never has any kind of smell. I took his hand, intending to pull him down beside me, to find some comfort in his arms, just for a moment. It was my last thought before sleep took me.

I dreamed of Christmas, with all the decorations, the food, the laughter and the wine. I dreamed of two men, Grant and David, watching me with love in their eyes as we opened presents, an infant in an antique cradle not far away. I sighed with contentment as they began to talk softly together, their eyes still on me.

I reached into the cradle, taking the child. Her eyes were my eyes, her smile all mine. I felt a quiver in my chest, a swelling I’d never felt before. This was my child. I stared at her in wonder. I had a child of my very own.

Tears of joy filled my eyes as I looked down at her. Sadness suddenly overwhelmed me, I would never leave her as my parents had left us, never!

I felt the emotion so fiercely it woke me up. I looked around, unsure of where I was, but then I heard their voices. Grant was awake!

I’d like to say I leaped from the chair to his side, but it was more a fall to the floor as I slid from the side of the awkward chair. I picked myself up from the floor and rushed to his side. I took his hand as he smiled at me, David on the other side, and kissed the knuckles of his long fingers.

“You’re awake!” I said, brushing tears from my face. I wasn’t sure if they were leftovers from the dream or if they were because he was awake.

“So are you, Sleeping Beauty. I’m so glad to see you!” His smile was tired but it lifted the corner of his eyes.

“Not as glad as I am to see you.” I kissed his knuckles again, resting my cheek on his hand clasped in mine.

“I think we could argue about that, but ha! I learned something today. Life is short, and it can be made a lot shorter.” His eyes went grim and sad for a moment. His grip loosened on mine and he pulled away. His face went dark and a wall came up that I didn’t know how to knock down.

“It can indeed. I know that well. My parents left us so suddenly…” My voice cut out and I had to swallow to be able to speak again. “I learned long ago to never take a day for granted.”

I was hoping to distract him, to bring him back to me. He seemed to rally and his grip tightened on mine once again.

“I guess you did, Toni.” Grant pulled his hand away from me so he could push himself into a higher position. “I can’t wait to get out of this place, but my legs don’t seem to want to leave it.”

He was trying to make me laugh and I tried to give it to him, but none of us really knew what damage had been done to his spine, even with all of the expensive equipment and tests.

“The doctor said we have to wait and see, Grant. You might be kicking my ass at basketball again by this time next week. Don’t lose hope, mate,” David said, filling in the blank space my silence left. The love for his friend was obvious in his voice. “I’m going to head to the house if you’re good?”

David looked at both Grant and me so I nodded. “I’ll need to call Eric in the morning, but I can stay.”

“Thanks. I need to find out what’s going on at the station and talk to the chief. I’ll come by later in the morning. Want me to bring you anything?” His eyes were distant, already on the hours ahead.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks, David.” He came to me and took me in his arms. I wound mine around his waist and rested my head just beneath his shoulder.

Just a few short days ago I would have died before I ever let him touch me. Now he was an integral part of my life, a comfort I didn’t want to ever have to learn to live without. He’d been in that building today too, he’d been in just as much danger as Grant. He’d just stayed out of the way of harm a little better. I hugged him tighter because I didn’t want to let him go.

“I have to go, but I’ll be back later, Toni. Take care of him. For both of us.” With a soft kiss he was gone, and I was alone with Grant.

“Want to climb up here with me?” he asked as he pulled his blanket up.

“You sure I won’t hurt you?” I looked at him doubtfully, not sure how much he could feel but he had to be in pain.

He waved at the bags and bottles dripping liquids into his IV. “I’m surprised I can feel anything with all of that in me. It’ll be fine. I need to feel you beside me, Toni. Please.”

“I’d love to.” I kicked my shoes off and climbed in with him, his left arm pulled me tight to his side.

I held onto him, my arm over his chest, and breathed deeply. The world was back on its axis now. I felt the band that had been wrapped around my chest for hours finally let go. I sighed, content, even under the circumstances. He was alive and that was what mattered.