Page 144 of In Your Wake

I caution a step closer, but she crosses her arms in defiance.

“When are you due?”

She glowers at me, biting her lower lip. “May 28th.”

“Perfect. Give me a month. Or two. Then you can move in and…” I shrug, letting the words linger, afraid to let my imagination wander too far into the future and picture what we could have together, if only she wanted to. “It’ll be great.”

A shadow crosses her face. “Mitch, come on. We can’t be roommates. It’s too weird.”

Nothing with Maxine is ever easy, so I shouldn’t be surprised with how she’s taking this.

“Well, you can’t stay in that apartment with a newborn. It’ll drive your neighbors nuts.”

She rolls her eyes. “I don’t have neighbors. Be serious.”

“I’m being completely serious. I want you to be happy. Honestly, I came back looking for a clean slate. I wanted to buy this house, fix it up, and be closer to you. To all of you,” I tack on. “I didn’t sign with that German team because I wanted to come home. Permanently.

“That’s why I’m doing the podcast. I can live here and still work. I want to be more present at the brewery, and be closer to my mom, too. And if you let me, I want to help with the inn. I mean, it’s my name on that sign—what sort of co-owner would I be if I left it all up to my pregnant—” I stop, realizing I’m rambling.

I run a hand through my hair. “I’m sure you can totally handle this alone, and this has nothing to do with you carrying my child,” I add. A flutter of butterflies takes off in my stomach when I hear the words out loud—my child. “But I figure it’s as much my responsibility as yours now, Max, so I should be around.”

She stares at me, then looks down, running her hand along one of her braids and plays with the tips. “How do you know you’ll stick around this time?”

Her question stabs me in the chest. She’s not wrong for doubting this.

“Losing Dad made me see a lot of things. Deep down, I’ve always known that Oakwhite is my home, but I was afraid to come back. It wasn’t until I saw you and the guys that it all became clear.” I knock my hip. “I think the universe has been giving me hints for a while now.” I step closer, reach out, and wrap my hands around her waist. “And this is the cherry on the sundae. The timing is too perfect; I buy a house here and you tell me you’re… that we’re having a baby?”

It’s all suddenly so real, and my chest fills with warmth. How can I care so much about someone who isn’t even born yet?

Still, Maxine’s brow remains pinched.

“What is it?” I ask.

She blows out her cheeks. “This is a lot to take in. I wasn’t expecting it to go this way.”

“You thought I wouldn’t support you?” I try to ignore how her lack of faith in me hurts and drop my hands.

“I never doubted you’d be supportive. I’m just surprised you actually want to be part of this.”

“And I hate that you’re surprised. But there’s no question in my mind that I want to be a part of this. All you have to ask yourself is whether you want me to be or not.”

She looks around, shaking her head in disbelief.

The idea of not being in my child’s life stabs me worse than anything ever has. I know Maxine would never keep the kid from me. But we’re still so undefined. And I never anticipated this kind of problem when my time came to be a father.

Worry clouds her blue eyes, and she nibbles her lip, keeping her arms crossed as if shielding herself.

“Max, you don’t need to worry about us. I’m not pressuring you into anything. No matter what, I’m here for both of you. If you want to live here, the house is yours. If you don’t, then we’ll figure something out. Regardless, I’m staying put.”

Her eyes dart everywhere without focusing on anything, and she keeps fiddling with her braid. I’m desperate to hold her, to make her feel safe, and make up for all the time we’ve wasted. The memories of our last conversation in the cemetery return, and I shove my needs down deep. This isn’t the time to break what’s left of our fragile bond.

“Max, I promise you, I’m staying,” I insist. “But I should warn you, I’m going to be annoying as hell.”

“So, pretty much status quo, then?” she replies with a giggle, then blinks, her eyes glossy.

She walks around the room, running her fingers along the walls, flipping light switches on and off, then faces me with a determined expression. I swallow hard, preparing myself for the rejection.

“Okay,” she whispers.