Page 16 of Chivalry is Not Dead

“Grandmother! You scared me half to death.”

“No,” Mom chimes in. “Sanders is the one half to death, dear.” She winks at him and he winks back; the pair having formed quite the bond in the last few weeks.

“Hush, both of you,” Grandmother admonishes. “It says here, ‘Winter Solstice is a celebration of rebirth. A time to reset. This could be applied to the physical, spiritual, or emotional realms. Observe Winter Solstice especially if you seek clarity and newness in your life.’”

“What book is that?” I ask.

“The Complete Guide to Using the Witches’ Calendar.”

“And your thought process is…?”

She looks at me like the answer is obvious. “Sanders died on Samhain. It would make sense that he would be able to pass through the veil on other important dates as well, he’s just never been around to test that theory out.”

“It is an interesting theory,” Mom adds. “We’ve been so focused on spells for rebirth, return, and peace, I didn’t think about looking closer at when Sanders was coming and going.”

“But when it does come, do I simply push him through or…?” I ask.

Grandmother pauses, one finger tapping idly at her nose. “I’m sure that will become apparent in time.”

“When is the Winter Solstice?” Sanders asks, looking contemplative with his elbows propped on his thighs and his hands folded under his chin.

My heart sinks. “December 21st. Which is over a month from now.”

He’s quiet, processing through our discovery. I stand up and move to the table he’s occupying, sitting close enough to have a conversation without prying ears. “We can keep looking in the meantime,” I suggest. “There’s no guarantee that the solstice idea will work, and I’m sure there’s more spells or potions or something we can try if we keep researching.”

I feel that all too familiar tug, hating that we’ve disappointed Sanders in some way. Finally, he shakes his head. “I do not wish to keep researching.”

“You don’t?” I’m so surprised, I speak louder than I intend to. Both Mom and Grandmother look our way, obviously eavesdropping on our conversation.

“I do not. If I only have a month left, I would rather live a full life outside of these walls.” He looks toward my mom. “Though I do love spending time with you both, I want to experience a bit more than researching. It has been so long since I have truly lived. Let me spend my last few weeks experiencing all life has to offer.”

“Of course, dear,” Mom says, tears in her eyes. “You deserve all of that and more.”

Sanders stands, offering me his hand. “Lady Penelope. Let us go live.”

The first order of business in his new mission to live? The grocery store to get more cereal. “What if we combined Reese’s Puffs and Cinnamon Toast Crunch in a bowl with the milk that is chocolate?” Sanders asks, excitement reminiscent of a child who has been allowed to have sugar for the first time.

“Honestly, that sounds disgusting. But your wish is my command,” I tease. And I don’t correct him on his wording for chocolate milk because honestly I think it’s adorable. “We should make a list of all of the things you want to do in the next month. Just to make sure we don’t miss anything important.”

“An excellent idea, Penelope. Make sure to add the cereal thing.”

“Of course I’m going to add the cereal thing. What do you take me for?”

He throws a look of confusion my way. “Is that another one of your sayings?”

“You’ll catch on eventually,” I reply.

A sudden wave of sadness hits me, and I realize it’s coming from our thread. I stop, sidestepping in front of him so he has to stop too. “You’re sad.”

It’s not a question. It’s a fact. I can feel his sadness, viscerally.

“I am. How can you tell?” he asks as if he knows the answer but wants to make sure I’m understanding as well.

My hand floats up to the center of my chest. “Here. I can feel it here.”

He nods, his own hand rising to meet mine—hovering but not quite touching. He raises an eyebrow in question and I nod. “Here?” he confirms, a strong hand encompassing my delicate one.

“Can… does that happen to you?” I ask, mortified as I realize all of the incredibly inappropriate feelings I’ve been projecting toward him and even more so as I realize this is the first time I’ve ever felt any feelings through my thread.