Page 160 of Scarbound

“It does matter,” Duri replied quietly. “Because what I feel for you is neither brotherly nor friendly.”

Noeul looked at him. Duri didn’t look away.

“Chung-Hee hyung was my first romantic attraction,” Noeul said after a moment. “For years, I was so consumed by what I felt for him that I refused to examine anything else.”

His gaze dropped to their joined hands. “But that doesn’t mean I never noticed you. I thought about you in New York more often than I admitted. I wrote messages I never sent. Once, when someone asked about my type, I described you without meaning to.”

Duri stared at him.

“Green eyes,” Noeul continued, almost embarrassed. “Brown hair. Long, toned legs.” A faint smile touched his mouth. “Then I told myself it meant nothing. You were younger. Ji-Woo’s friend. Someone I had known since childhood. It was easier to dismiss the feeling than ask myself what it meant.”

“You have no idea how many years I’ve had feelings for you, do you?”

His voice wavered.

Noeul went still.

“Every moment you were away hurt. I tried not to let my heart follow you, but I couldn’t stop it. And then you came back, and somehow it became worse.” Duri swallowed. “I watched you choose someone else. I watched him hurt you. And I had to stand there pretending being your friend was enough because I was terrified that if I asked for more, I’d lose even that.”

“Duri…”

“And now you’re here.” His eyes searched Noeul’s. “So yes, hyung. It matters whether you love him.”

Noeul remained silent for several seconds.

“I feel many things for Chung-Hee,” he said carefully.

Duri’s hand slowly withdrew from his. His smile vanished.

So that was it.

Noeul had chosen Chung-Hee after all.

“No.” Noeul reached for him before he could move farther away. “Let me finish.”

Duri looked at him.

“I feel anger. Guilt. Fear. Sometimes pity.” Noeul hesitated. Saying the next words aloud felt strangely frightening, as though admitting them would finally close a door he had kept open for years. “But none of them are connected to desire or love.”

Noeul heard his own words again.

I don’t love him.

It was the first time he had admitted it, even to himself. And instead of grief, what he felt was relief.

Duri’s expression softened. His fingers found Noeul’s again.

“I want you.”

Noeul’s breath caught.

“I’ll be brave enough to taste your love,” Duri continued, a faint smile touching his lips, “even if it poisons me.”

He leaned closer but stopped before their lips met.

Noeul stared at him.

Duri’s breath trembled. Everything in him wanted to close the distance, but he didn’t.