Page 37 of Miss Christmas

He couldn’t argue though he wanted to. Desperately.

“So then what is it?” And why isn’t it enough? He wanted her to convince him it was, but she didn’t want what he wanted. She didn’t want to be anyone’s missus.

“It’s a hot affair. As if you didn’t know.” He heard the strain in her words.

“Now who’s lying?”

“Then you tell me what we have?” She’d turned it around on him. Damn. She was good at this game. He took a deep, unsteady breath and decided to tell the whole truth, to free himself completely. A sharp pain shot through his back, reminding him of the danger involved in total vulnerability. Emotional bravery had never been his strong suit, at least he’d never thought so, but this was no time for pussies.

He said, “We have an emotional connection. The physical connection is obvious. The chemistry off the charts. But it goes deeper with us, Scar. We have something that could turn into . . . love.”

He let the word drop like an atomic bomb.

He heard her breath catch as if he’d wounded her with it.

Then she disconnected the call.

Chapter 10

It was almost midnight and Scarlet tried not to wake Di. They shared the bedroom, taking turns sleeping in the bed. Tonight had been Dee’s night. Scarlet’s chest clenched tight and she held in a sob as she imagined the aftermath of her cruelty. She pictured Will after she’d hung up on him, striking down his confession of love as if it were an obscenity.

Rising from her air mattress, she held a hand over her mouth and tried to hold back the tears. She ran for the doorway as if she were sick with misery and needed to hold back until she reached some unseen depository to empty her soul of the poison.

“Hey, Scar. Where are you going? What’s wrong?”

Scarlet spun around. Dee sat up in bed and turned on the bedside lamp. She felt exposed, shamed, and out of control. Sobs of pain racked her as she ran back to the bed and climbed in.

“What is it, honey?” Dee sounded worried, but held her and patted her back. Tears streamed and she gulped air, heaving and sick like she hadn’t been since—

Oh no. This wasn’t the same. These were tears of remorse, not tears of loss. She felt this pain because she’d hurt Will, a decent, wonderful, loving, funny, charming, smart, hunky man. She was not crying for him, not herself, not because she’d lost him. She’d forfeited him after all, hadn’t she?

“Scarlet, what is it?” Dee shook her shoulders, not hard, but hard enough to pull her back from her insane thinking.

“I—I—” She pulled back and swiped at her nonstop tears. Dee gave her a tissue and she blew her nose and tried to calm herself with deep breaths.

“I’ve never seen you this way before. No matter how bad it’s gotten this past year. And we’ve had plenty of setbacks”

“It’s—” She hiccupped. “Only been ten months.” She’d turned into a lunatic.

Dee frowned. “You didn’t even cry after you broke up with Jason. And I have to tell you I thought that was uncanny. I’d have been balling my eyes out. I thought you were the strongest woman alive.” Dee took her hand and squeezed it. “Now you’re scaring me, Scar.”

“I’ve messed up, Di. I hung up on him.”

“You hung up on who?”

“Will.” She sniffed and felt ashamed that she didn’t have the courage to confess what she’d really done.

“But that’s not such a big deal. I’m sure he’ll forgive you for that.”

Scarlet tore another tissue from the box and swiped at her eyes, gathering herself. She needed to get this off her chest. To confront the truth.

“He told me . . . he loved me.” Because that was, in truth, what Will had said to her when she hung up on him. Not in so many words, but she knew. He knew. That had been exactly why she’d hung up. She couldn’t stand to be confronted with the possibility.

“And I hung up on him.” She finished with another miserable pathetic hiccup as Dee stared at her open-mouthed.

“You did?” her voice squeaked. “How awful. What are you going to do about it now?”

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