Page 7 of The Price Of Possession

Zain blows out a ring of smoke. His eyes bore into me with intensity. He snorts. “Keep tellin’ yourself that.”

Annoyance bubbles to the surface. The guy has no room to talk. I'm well aware of his tendencies. He’s just as fucked as me. He stalked Vesper, pulling her down into the pits of damnation. I'm not above any of that shit, but he doesn't get to act like a self-righteous fuck. I don't know the complexity of their relationship, but I know enough. I'm not as stupid as he thinks.

I take a heavy hit of my joint and slam my eyes closed. All I see is her crying face, and it pisses me off. What I need is a good fuck to erase her from my memory. And Goddamnit, I hope it works.

“Party tonight?” I ask, changing the subject. My eyes flick open and the image of her dissolves. He shrugs. “Don't care. Vesper and I are gonna hole up in my room. She wants to watch some fuckin’ show about serial killers.” He fights back a smirk. Right up his alley. I shake my head.

“She’s turning you into a pussy,” I point out. I love riling his ass up. He flicks cigarette ash in my direction. “Never,” he smirks. I confirm with Val, Silas, and Grey that they're in. I make sure Nyla is confirmed, too. She supplies me with the best medicines. I’ll probably fuck her, too. She's always willing to indulge. It makes it a hell of a lot easier to fuck when It's someone I give zero fucks about. I’m well aware how fucked up it is, I just don’t give a shit.

Vesper has taken charge of cleaning this shithole house. I don't envy her. You can finally see the natural wood floors without caked on mud and grime. She ripped up the old, dingy carpet on the stairs and upper levels, too. Tonight will probably be a big turnout. Plus, everyone needs a pick-me-up after Jax's disappearance. Mortensen sent out a mass email regarding it. He left out key details. He's stalling to see If I bow. I'm just waiting for shit to come to a head. Jax fucked with Vesper. In turn, Zain taught him a lesson the only way Zain knows. Violence. I'd say I'm surprised by his actions, but I'm not. The guy doesn't know the unholy bullshit he's unleashed. He doesn't need to tell me what he did. I already know.

No one gets away with offing an Elite without consequence. Mortensen and Jax's family demand sacrifice. Zain is my best friend. He knows I'll do what I can so he isn't implicated, but when Mortensen wants information, he gets it one way or another. Let's just hope he covered his tracks. I pop a couple pills to take the edge off before drowning in a bottle of Absinthe.

Everyone needs an escape. I'm always happy to offer one to the unsuspecting bitches. The only time I can fucking live is having a good time. Sex, drugs, pills and weed. This whole Clara shit will be here tomorrow. I'm not blind to the ticking timer countdown. One more fucking day to indulge before I throw myself to the wolves.

Kieran age 16

“You passed, Kieran.” My father’s voice reaches my ears, but I don't hear him. I'm on the outside looking in at myself. The pale blonde at my feet is now full of abyssal desolation. The systemic collapse of her soul is shining through her exterior, and it’s all my doing. Her battered, bruised body lays motionless on the cold slab floor. I back away slowly as if it'll erase the shit I've done. What's fucked is I liked it. What a warped perception. I hate myself for who he's molded me to be. Cheers erupt around me. The crowd closes in around her listless body. The Elites start pulling their cocks out and prepping themselves for her. The last thing I see is the hopeful light leave her eyes as the gap closes in.

“What the fuck?” The words leave my throat rough and scarred. This isn't the reaction he was hoping for from me. I'm a Goddamn monster . . . just like him . . .

His eyes narrow into a threatening volcanic fire. “You are worthy

of leading, Kieran. Don't destroy what you've been bred for.”

Father’s eyes stay trained on me. His malignant stare drills into me like I'm a disease he wants to eradicate. That shit used to cut me deep. His approval means nothing to me anymore. His sick ways only drew me closer to chaos and destruction. A desperate pull to sever myself from him.

He tries to ground me with assurance. To gain back some sense of control now that he realizes he's lost. His hand grasps my shoulder. “It's necessary. For the greater good. They serve us. Their purpose is to fulfill our desires, Kieran. You are a man now. This will be yours to lead and indulge in.”

His words make my stomach churn. He's prepared me for a life of sex, crime, and destruction. Fuck this. Fuck all of it. It's because of him I crave sexual violence and fucked up ideals.

“No,” I bite out. I take a harsh step back. His face turns murderous. He slinks over to the woman, pushing through the crowd. He flicks open a blade. Everyone parts for him. He grips her matted hair, lifting her face so I can see the destruction I've caused. Then he slices it along her neck. Blood sprays everywhere and my vision distorts. The last thing I remember is the light leaving her cold sapphire eyes. “You. Will. Obey.”

The haze of alcohol and drugs hit my system like a MAC truck. The room is a blur, and I can drown into nothingness. My head rests against the backside of the couch. Nyla sits on my lap while another bitch hangs around my neck like a leech. Her teeth graze over my jawline. The vibration from the music relaxes me. The smoky haze clouds the room. Endless streams of bodies collide in sex, drugs, and euphoria.

“Do you want me to make you feel good, Kier?” Nyla purrs over the music. A sensual, dark laugh leaves my throat. I thread my hands through my hair and hiss out a breath.

“Shiiit,” I curse.

The other bitch plants kisses along my neck and jaw. Every touch is electric. What's fucked is all I envision is her. Clara. Maybe I'm turning insane. The chick lives rest free in my head, and Goddamnit, I wish it was her kneeling between my thighs.

The buckle of my jeans falls loose. My eyes snap closed. Nyla's warm mouth wraps around the head of my weeping cock. I hiss and shutter. The bitch knows how to suck a dick, I'll give her that. God fucking damn.

“Fuck, that's it.” I fist her hair, urging her to take more of me. My teeth slam into my bottom lip, drawing blood.

My blurred thoughts fall back to Clara. Her body under me. Her perfect curvy body. Those blonde strands laid out on my pillow while I drill into her. Fuck, this is insane. I’m so fucking gone. I reach out with my other hand and grab Nyla's throat, forcing her down to the base of my cock until she sputters. Her nails dig into my thighs, but I don't relent. I want the air to leave her fucking lungs.

Fuck, I'm gonna to cum.

My leg muscles contract. Desperate whimpers leave my throat. I chant Clara's name like it's a new religion.

Shiiiit.

Cum flows down Nyla's throat. She swallows like the whore she is. Soft cries leave her throat and imagine it's my girl. Thank fuck both of these bitches are too far gone to care whose name leaves my lips.

I press my plump lips together. My pink lipstick soaks into my skin. Val and Silas slither beside me, linking arms with me. Val slips a few pills into my palm. He looks at me with lustful reverence. I return an amused smirk before placing them under my tongue. I'm ready to lose myself in the abysmal darkness. To drown out every fragment of my childhood and Kieran's dismantling. Val roams his hand up my backside in a sensual game. He likes pushing my limits.

Silas pushes open the door. The same weed, alcohol, and sweat smell permeate the air of the echoing rotunda. Zain and Vesper are curled up together, perched across the room on top of the dining room table. A light smile fills her face. Envy fills my inside. I'm hollow. I'll never know what it feels like to know love, affection, and utter devotion. Instead, I'm left with an inviolable void of self-destruction and self-loathing. Oh, and unimaginable panic attacks.