Page 55 of Her Unsuitable Match

Myles nodded once. “Thank you for telling me the truth. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” He walked to the door, his steps quick. He had his hand on the latch when she called his name, and when he looked over his shoulder he read the confusion in her lovely face. “I am sorry I forced you out to the country, Pippa. I am sorry you regret marrying a man as broken as I am. Because I am not whole or capable. But someday, I hope to be worthy of more than just your friendship.” It was the nearest thing to a confession of his feelings that he could summon.

Turning away from her, Myles left before she said anything else. He went directly down the stairs and out the door. He needed to walk. And think. Away from Pippa, Winston, his parents, and anyone else trying to convince him that he was as sound in mind and body now as he had ever been. Because they were all wrong. They didn’t know anything about him.

His wife had wanted freedom to attend events in London, to explore the city, to come and go as she pleased when she pleased. She needed a husband to give her wings, not shackle her to his reclusive needs. Why had he married Pippa when she had made it clear what she wanted?

Because he hadn’t thought it would threaten his heart with breaking when he realized she didn’t want him.

Could he change her mind? If she could see the broken pieces of him and still admire him, could she love him? He didn’t know. He didn’t even know how to find out. So he went into the darkness beneath the trees and paced. Marching down one path and then another. Until he grew too tired to walk. Too tired to think. And he fell asleep beneath a tree.

Nineteen

Pippa had hesitated too long to follow after her husband. By the time she opened the door to the hall, he was gone. She heard the front door of the house snap shut. She hadn’t had the chance to tell him he was wrong—that she didn’t regret marrying him.

She went to bed but did not sleep for hours and hours. What stupidity had compelled her to offer him words too tepid to provide true comfort? She hadn’t offered him her compassion or understanding. Because she hadn’t spoken from her heart—but from her guilt. From a complete lack of understanding what he needed.

Words offered without her heart’s intent behind them had wounded her husband. She had done everything wrong. What made matters worse was her hope that he would return proved ill-founded. When she finally fell asleep, the other half of the bed remained empty.

Pippa overslept, not waking until late morning. She shifted in her bed, rolled over, and stared at the empty pillow next to her own. It remained untouched. Slipping from beneath the covers, Pippa went straight to the bellpull to summon her maid.

When her maid appeared, nearly a quarter of an hour later, she curtsied and held out a folded square of paper before Pippa could ask for assistance dressing. She needed to find Myles. They had to talk—she had to explain to him what she meant the night before. To tell him how sorry she was.

“What is this?” Pippa took the paper and unfolded it, realizing it was a note. She recognized the strong, swooping handwriting immediately.

The maid ducked her head and spoke quietly. “Mr. Cobbett asked that I give that to you. After I packed a valise for him.”

Pippa walked to the window and pulled back the curtains, letting the morning sunlight fall upon the paper.

Lady Philippa,

Forgive me for taking my leave through paper and pen. There is something I must do. I will return in a weeks’ time. My family will look after you until then. Please know, despite all I said last evening, that I hold your happiness dearer above all else. There is more I would say, but it must wait.

Your Husband,

Myles

The note was far too short. Too vague. And what was it that Myles had to do? Where was he going?

Folding the paper, Pippa looked up at her maid. “When did he leave?” Or could he still be in the house? Perhaps she could catch him—

“Two hours ago, my lady.”

Pippa turned away from her servant and stared out the window, no longer seeing the vibrant flower garden or the trees. She saw nothing. Felt only cold disappointment. “I would like a tray brought to my room, please. I do not feel well.”

Not well enough to face the family. To answer questions they might have about where Myles had gone.

But then—what if one of them knew why he had left?

“Wait—I changed my mind.” Pippa held her hand out to stay the maid, who was nearly to the door to obey her first order. She swallowed her pride and forced herself to appear calm. “It would be rude to stay away. Please, find something for me to wear so I might spend the day with my mother-in-law.”

If anyone knew what Myles was up to, it would likely be his mother or his brother. Myles and Winston spent a lot of time in each other’s company. Surely her husband couldn’t have disappeared without telling someone where he had gone.

Except half an hour later, it seemed he had done just that.

“Myles left with nary a word to me, my dear.” Lady Greenwood held a watering can in one hand and a small potted fern in the other. Pippa had found her mother-in-law busy in the greenhouse. “Other than goodbye, of course. He promised he would return soon. I asked where he was going—we have engagements for the two of you to attend. He only said, ‘There is something I must do.’” She narrowed her eyes at Pippa. “Most cryptic. I had hoped you knew what he was up to.”

Pippa slowly shook her head, then gestured to the fern. She could find Winston later. “Might I help with your work in here? I need something to keep my hands busy.”

“Of course, dear. Here. Find a suitable place for this one where it won’t be covered over by larger fronds.” After that, Pippa helped trim hothouse flowers for the house. Fragrant blossoms were to go in every room. “The roses outside the greenhouse will bloom soon. I have already spied several buds among my whites and pinks. The reds are slow to wake this year. I have a party for my closest friends in the garden, once all the rosebushes are showing color.”