I sit down next to her. Look into her eyes.
“What?” she whispers. “Why are you looking at me?”
“I’m just… sorry. You know?”
“For what?”
“Everything that’s happened to you.” I nod my head at the book.
“Look, I don’t need pity or anything. I’m—”
But I lean in and stop her talking with a kiss. Her lips are very soft at first. Then they stiffen a little.
I pull back, taking that as a no. “I’m sorry. I just wanted to kiss you.”
Her fingertips come up to her lips, stay there touching them for a moment. Her eyes meet mine and there’s a sparkle of pink fire in there. She is so thoroughly pink now I almost can’t remember what she looked like as a silver.
“Oh,” she breathes. “Sorry. You just… surprised me.”
I sigh and lean all the way back on the large couch until I’m flat, but my feet are still on the floor. “I’ve been thinking…” I eyeball her, then look back up at the ceiling.
“About?”
“How unfair this is for you.” I eyeball her again and catch her pouting a little.
“What’s fair, anyway?” She shrugs. “I lost interest in fair a long time ago.”
“Not true at all. You’re the one who asked me about it first.”
“When?” She scrunches up her nose.
“That day. When you said I have all these choices of people. Luck, and Tray, and Brigit. You said it was unfair.”
“Oh.” She looks forward, out her massive space window. “It kind of is, I guess. But I was moody that day. Things were… not going well.”
“But you’re right. It’s not fair.”
“Well, like you said. You’re just one of those likable guys.”
“No, I mean… it’s not fair for you to have no one. So that’s why I’m here interrupting your rest.”
She stares at me, confused.
“I have decided to be yours.”
“Mine?” She laughs.
“Mmm-hmm.” I nod. “Yours. If you’ll have me.”
“I… well… what does that even mean?”
“Come here,” I say, taking her hand and pulling her towards me.
She’s got her legs all curled up. Knees pressed against my thigh. But she rests her head on my chest. Stays stiff and still for a moment. Holds her breath, I think. Because suddenly it comes out in a rush. “What are we doing?”
“Holding each other.”
“Oh.”