Page 83 of Meant for Mayhem

“We do not look at each other.”

We absolutely did, but Lori was the closest thing I’d ever had to a mom, and under no circumstances was I about to tell her how complicated things felt right now.

“We’re both focused on Leena, and that’s working well.”

“Good,” she said. “Boring, but good.”

I chuckled, feeling better that she still sounded like her sassy self. “Sorry to disappoint.”

“You couldn’t disappoint me if you tried.”

It was the most Lori thing she’d ever said, but tears sprung in my eyes at the words. I blinked them away, exhaustion getting the better of me.

“I’ve never said thank you,” I admitted, unable to keep my thoughts from veering into the vulnerable right now.

“It’s me that should thank you. You put your whole life on hold for me.”

I shook my head. “No. Before that.”

Lori was quiet for a beat, like she already knew exactly where my mind had gone. “My darling girl…”

The nice thing about talking this through with Lori was that she didn’t need me to explain—she’d been there.

After Mom walked out on us. After Dad went to prison. After two teenage boys found themselves responsible for raising a little sister neither of them wanted.

Watching Ty fight so hard for Junie these last few months made me realize how impossible that should’ve been. The system had looked at my brothers and Nana, shrugged, and decided good enough.

And dammit, it wasn’t.

Nana wanted nothing to do with us, even before Dad was gone. So when he left, it was the three of us kids in the trailer next door together.

There were plenty of nights the house was empty when Cash and Colton forgot to come home. Plenty of mornings I’d gone to school pretending I wasn’t hungry because we didn’t have food in the house. Plenty of afternoons sitting on the front steps waiting for someone who never remembered they were supposed to pick me up.

But even on my worst days, Lori was always there.

She never made a big deal of it. She just started keeping extra snacks in her classroom. Found reasons for me to stay after school until she knew one of my brothers was home. Picked me up in the summer because I was on her way to the library.

She never pitied me.

Never treated me differently.

But most importantly, she never made me feel like I was a burden.

“I should’ve said thank you a long time ago,” I whispered.

“For what?” she asked softly, but I knew she understood.

“You made sure I never fell through the cracks.”

Another quiet pause settled between us. “I did nothing special, sweetheart. All I did was love you.”

I teared up again, because that was such a Lori thing to say too. She’d never understand that what felt ordinary to her had completely changed the trajectory of my life.

“But you shouldn’t, Lori.” My throat closed, barely choking back my emotions. “How do you look at me and not think that I’m the reason you’re a widow?”

“Because your dad was driving the car that killed my husband, not you. You did nothing wrong, except be born into a family that didn’t deserve you.”

She said it so simply, as if no further explanation was needed. But these thoughts had haunted me for decades, making me feel like I’d never outrun the damage my family had caused.