Page 40 of Nightshade

And that? I sighed. “Of course not. But that’s the point of a pack, isn’t it? We take care of each other. Everyone wants to spare the others pain if they can. We all work together to try to care for everyone.”

Altair’s hands paused in picking for a moment, and his head rested softly against the round of my shoulder. He gave a sigh, and since he couldn’t breathe, I knew it was an emotional gesture rather than physical. “That . . . that sounds nice,” was what he finally whispered.

I reached down with my left hand while continuing to work with my right, and wound my arm around his waist. “It is. You should try it while you’re with us. Maybe you’ll find yourself right at home with a pack of your own, werewolf or not.”

CHAPTER 20

Altair

I wasn’t Ivan’s only progeny, but I had never known a vampire to work with another the way these wolves did.

We didn’t try to spare each other pain, only avoid it ourselves. If I could skirt a punishment by directing it at another, I would. I wouldn’t even hesitate.

Leo would’ve hesitated. That kindness would’ve killed him eventually, but he wouldn’t have let someone else hurt if he could take it on and spare them suffering.

Even a vampire.

I wanted to think that all these wolves had managed to do, by sharing the burden, was ensure that everyone suffered, but it was more than that. They took care of each other in a way that I’d forgotten.

And like it cost him nothing at all, Leo offered me the same. He invited me to participate in his pack.

A pack.

It wasn’t like I’d never been a part of a community before, but humans weren’t like this either. They didn’t work together and function as a unit. Maybe the Wildwood wolves were still struggling to figure out how to do that on a wider scale, but Leo wasn’t.

Leo knew precisely how the world ought to be and took what steps he could to see that it changed for the better.

I’d never met anyone like him—someone whose kindness wasn’t forged by ignorance but tempered by adversity. I didn’t think a person could continue to be good when they’d faced loss like he had, and there he was, eating disgusting flowers in the woods just to make sure that they wouldn’t hurt another wolf.

When we were finished picking flowers, Leo’s hand slid across the small of my back. Wolves were touchier than I was used to, but I liked the heat radiating off him, and I didn’t want him to pull away, so it was a relief when his hand slipped into mine again.

We walked back to his place, our fingers laced together, with unhurried steps. I wasn’t put off by the idea of returning to Katya, but all the thoughts knotting together in my head were made infinitely more complicated with every additional person to account for. Leo’s brothers could be there, or Evie or Henry or⁠—

I just needed a moment to get my head on straight, and I’d manage with any of them. I’d be polite and personable. But I could see light flickering through the windows of the back door through the trees, and there was the porch that wrapped all the way around Katya’s home.

We were right there on the bottom of the stairs, and I wasn’t ready to go inside yet.

First—

“Leo?”

He paused, pulling his foot off the stair and turning to look at me, a soft smile on his face. His gray eyes gleamed in the moonlight. “Yeah?”

I glanced down at our hands, still laced together. This was . . . This was definitely the stupidest thing I’d ever done. Okay, maybe it wasn’t. I’d made a mess of my own life time and again, but I’d never intentionally risked anyone else in the process.

Most of the time, it was just me that I got into trouble.

The last time I’d thought to kiss someone just because I wanted to, I’d gotten my throat torn open for the pleasure.

I knew Leo wasn’t going to hurt me, but would I hurt him? I’d pull him into harm’s way just like that poor family who’d tried to help me. Only this time, I knew I was being selfish. It wasn’t desperation and happenstance drawing me toward him.

But I looked up again, taking in the curious tilt of his head and the way his soft lips puckered in consternation, and I couldn’t help it.

The autumn air was cool, but when I gripped Leo by the front of his shirt, he was all heat. It radiated out of him, down my arm. I leaned toward him, and his lips parted on a soft gasp, but he didn’t pull away.

His eyes fell right to my mouth, and his tongue darted out to wet them. I wanted a taste of it. Just a taste. I wouldn’t hurt him. I didn’t have to be like Ivan, even as devoid of humanity as I was.

“Leo,” I whispered, tugging him down as I pushed up on the balls of my feet.