Page 39 of A Castle of Broken Memories

“I mean it,” I growled, letting my alpha command seep into my voice. “Don’t push me on this.”

Calum immediately dropped his head, any trace of levity disappearing in a blink, but Tenebris continued to eye me with a mix of curiosity and—oh gods—cunning. I summoned my wolf claws, a layer of black fur sprouting over the back of my hand, and flipped him the bird as I stomped off to find somewhere to seethe in private. Since Tenebris would most likely follow me if I went inside the cabin, and Jack had already fled to the trees, that pretty much left the creek and the grassy field beyond.

I shucked off my boots and cloak, along with daggers and leather armor, leaving them beside the bubbling creek while I stepped into its clear water. A school of little fishies surrounded my feet, but they soon scattered and went back to swimming around.

“What? Nowhere to bring me today?” I asked, trailing my fingers through the calf high water. I wonder if all the animals in the castle are as clever as the ones in this room? I glanced toward the trees. Maybe Jack knows. “Nope. Don’t even go there, Mari. Asking Jack requires speaking to Jack, and you are going to do as little of that as possible if you know what’s good for you. Love is not on the table.”

I scooped up a flat, purple stone and sent it skimming over the water’s surface, focusing on the resulting ripples instead of recalling the way Jack looked earlier, prowling through the steamy water of the springs like a predator on the hunt.

And I was definitely not thinking about the raw vulnerability he’d shown in that brief moment before hurrying off to the well. We weren’t together anymore. His emotional state was none of my concern.

Only, before we’d been lovers, we’d been friends.

Best friends.

Maybe… seeing as how we were stuck here with no one else for him to confide in… I could, perhaps, be that for him again? Not his best friend, per se, but a listening ear. And I have been trying to be a better person. Checking on him would just be a good deed, really. Nothing romantic needed to come of it.

I bent down to pick up another rock, only to look up in surprise when I realized I’d wandered all the way up the creek bed and into the woods while lost in my musing. The pool where I’d found Ollie was just up ahead, and a few yards beyond that was the old stone well. Jack’s back was to me as he leaned over it, arms braced against the lip while he stared down into the recesses below.

I swallowed, taking a tentative step closer. “I stopped by your dad’s house before coming up here. He’s head of the council now, so I wanted to consult with him before climbing the beanstalk.”

Jack turned his head, the only sign that I might have caught him by surprise in the slight twitch of his shoulders. “Oh yeah?

I turned the stone over in my hand. “Yup. No surprise there, right?”

He shook his head, his gaze returning to the well. “Not really, no.”

I took another step closer. “Sean answered the door, and I just about shit my pants. He looks exactly like you did at that age.”

“Poor kid.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever. You know you were hot.”

He let out a rough chuckle. “I don’t know about that.” He scrubbed a hand over his face before finally turning to face me, and my heart squeezed painfully at the sight of his red-tinged eyes. Leaning against the well, he crossed his arms and arched a brow. “Wait, so are you telling me you think my kid brother is hot?”

I smirked. “Uh, yeah. He’s stupid hot now. Tenebris turned into a flirty pile of goo when he answered the door.”

“Tenebris, as in the man-child you failed at passing off as your lover?”

I flicked a spray of water up with my foot. “Not. Funny.”

“You’re right, it wasn’t funny.” The levity slipped from his voice while his eyes narrowed into something I could only describe as smoldering. “Hearing him talk about how he’d touched you, how he knew you in ways only I used to know…” A muscle in his jaw ticked, and I ached to step forward and lick it. “It hurt more than anything I’d endured up here so far.”

He was right. Throwing Tenebris in his face had been a shitty move on my part, even if I had only been trying to protect myself. “I’m sorry,” I whispered softly, dropping my gaze to the edge of the pool. “I shouldn’t have lied to you like that. I was just…” The word stuck in my throat as the alpha in me bristled, but I bit down on my pride and forced it out. “…scared.”

I waited for a smart remark about the infamous Mariana actually being afraid of something, but the only sound that followed was the soft tread of footfalls in the grass as Jack stepped forward, the tips of his boots toeing the edge of the pool. My gaze roamed the worn leather, taking in the multitude of scuffs and scratches earned from ten years of surviving this place.

Ten years away from his home.

Away from his family.

Away from me.

My lip quivered as the emotion I’d so carefully packed away came bubbling to the surface. We should have been together. In the forest, on the outside, or even up here in this castle—it didn’t matter where, so long as he was with me. Instead, I’d spent a decade carving him out of my heart and filling the gaping hole with anything and everything that would make me feel like I was in control, when in reality, I was spiraling in the opposite direction.

Rough fingers brushed my cheek before cupping my chin, and I blinked back tears as Jack tilted my head up to meet his gaze.

“It’s okay. You’re allowed to be scared sometimes, Mariana.” His lips curved into a sad smile. “And you’re allowed to move on. With Tenebris or Calum or whoever.” He hesitated. “Well, maybe not with Noah. He can go straight to hell.”